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Recusitatorwannabe

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  1. Recusitatorwannabe

    Are there any normal non arrogant pre-meds?

    Damn; I'm the first in my family to go to university, my dad is a bus driver and my mom works at Walmart; I do notice that some people in my program have money (cars and such) but I thought at least some people had like at least immigrant parents with not much money.
  2. Recusitatorwannabe

    Are there any normal non arrogant pre-meds?

    I’m trying I really am; I wanted to be part of a study group and this guy was like “no offence but you’re not good enough to be in this study group, you’ll just confuse us, you work hard but you’re just not smart enough, it’s kind of sad.”
  3. Recusitatorwannabe

    Are there any normal non arrogant pre-meds?

    I’m literally getting bullied lol. In a “you’re not good enough” way; like straight bullied
  4. I feel like a lost sheep. I am not arrogant nor conceited; but that is because I am not naturally gifted. Are the majority of people in medicine naturally smart beings who look down on others? Trying to not let others affect me but why is everyone so mean and judgy? I get it's competitive but so are many other things. Like soccer players will literally play against each other in the world cup and still be friends. Why is there this whole thing that "in order for me to succeed others must fail"; like I don't understand?
  5. Recusitatorwannabe

    What Am I doing Wrong?

    I don't even know anymore, I thoroughly enjoy medicine but I don't particularly enjoy things that are the building blocks that leads up to it; if that makes sense, like knowing what to do for someone who is sick, what kind of sicknesses there are, how to ethically deal with people (my ultimate dream is surgery; but I've just accepted my fate at this point). I can't be a nurse; I would have had to major in nursing; I like medicine, engineering medical instruments I wouldnt mind; because I'd feel like I'm contributing to the medical field; but I would need to be in engineering- the reason I took computer science in the first place was to kind of get some idea of what my capabilities are, and you need some level of understanding program in today's society for engineering. I thought about Pharmacy, but apparently thats just as hard; I do have an "all or nothing" in a way, (like a neuron, lol); I don't even know. I liked Calc I, didn't like Calc 2; Physics was good. Biology is good. Chemistry I didn't like first year very much, liking orgo better because it's more interesting, very time consuming to practice though. Cell Bio some of it I like, some of it I dislike. Neuro is soooo interesting, I love it; psych was cool, sociology was cool. Physiology is okay, some of it is super interesting, some if it isn't. So I just don't know.
  6. Recusitatorwannabe

    What Am I doing Wrong?

    Wouldn't it make me happy in that I am doing something I enjoy? I honestly can see myself having fun memorizing things that save lives rather than the lac operon. The people are type A in pre-med as well, I am in a competitive university with the major that is useless without medicine; so everyone is trying to get into medicine. And computer science is done, I finished it. I wish I could take it off my transcript but I can't. I-I'll just shut up. I understand how annoying pre-meds must be, sorry.
  7. Recusitatorwannabe

    What Am I doing Wrong?

    I am not miserable (okay that's a lie, I partially am), just very confused and stressed. It is honestly very stressful, medical school would change in that I would know where I am going with life. The main thing that concerns me here is if I'm not good enough, I have no idea what I am going to do with my life. And computer science I 100% regret taking, but I stuck with it because I am so stubborn when I choose courses. And I know they're not prereq's but they're requirements for my major. Cell Biology I thought I would enjoy more as I enjoyed it last year; everything is has been pretty okay. I am trying to stick it out but I also want to be realistic. I am sorry for bothering, I just don't really talk to other people and other people seem to handle it pretty well so I feel like I have no excuses.
  8. Recusitatorwannabe

    What Am I doing Wrong?

    Honestly every time I go to see him and I ask him a question he’ll be like “did you read the lab manual?” Of course I read the lab manual! Like for instance the lab manual said to make a graph of the tubes we observed and to make a line of best fit. And then he said it was incorrect because it wasn’t supposed to have a line of best fit. And then he’ll be like “read the introduction” when I did! I take notes on it I highlight it like I swear to god I do. Like I don’t even know what to tell him, sorry I’m stupid? I can’t even like pretend to be negligent it’s so obvious I’ll go with my notes and highlights and it just means I’m stupid at this point. I don’t know, I’m trying to be confident but everyone is just so mean sometimes, I want to help people. Honestly like my family is so unspupportive; they tell me I’m causing myself unnessary stress and that because my high school experience was not normal I’ll never do well because I do not have the background foundations others do. I self taught myself biology , chemistry and calculus in a hospital; and completed it in school when I was released. My first year average was a 77. By osmas that’s like a 3.1. I’m trying to aim for over 90 this year but I don’t think it’s possible to get a good grade in cell biology anymore. organic I still have hope for because I got a 96 on that midterm (granted I keep getting 80’s in lab) Physiology I do pretty good on the labs I’ve gotten 100 on them, but this T.A like I don’t know he’s different from my cell biology one. He wants you to succeed like I’ll ask him question and he seems so passionate and eager to help. The orgo and cell bio T.A’s seem irritated; I also don’t have any friends so I think people like talk to older years for help where as I’m all alone. Neuro i I think I can also do well I got a 90 on that midterm and 100 on the last lab. But cell biology is going to drop me and I can feel it; just like how computer science dropped me last year. Would have been an 82 but more importantly gpa wise it would have been a 3.5, is don’t even know what to do. I 100 percent know why med schools want the grades they do; I wouldn’t want a doctor with bad grades either, like I would want a doctor that knows what they’re doing. For some reason it’s just difficult to get them for me. To be honest though like I wouldn’t care if my doctor did bad in computer science but loved anatomy; cell biology I can see the health aspects of it. So I’ll be disappointed with myself if I finish badly. I also really like the professor and was hoping to do research with him because his research looks so interesting but he would never take me. Sigh....
  9. Recusitatorwannabe

    What Am I doing Wrong?

    I am feeling really discouraged. Literally feel like a lab rat continuously getting shocked, learned helplessness I believe is the psychology term (At least school teaches me something, lol). Midterms I have improved upon, and my studying habits have become more efficient, but the LABS literally kill me. And this is always the easy part for everyone else, everyone else is like oh yay lab worth 30 percent that's an easy 100. And for me it really isn't; only physiology labs. Cell Biology Labs I have done SO POORLY, SO BAD. And I don't even know what to do at this point. I would go to the TA ask for help and everything and he would look at me like I was asking stupid questions and just looking at how my lab is marked makes me so upset with myself. I have question marks upon question marks and it's just embarrassing, the physiology labs are fine; pretty straight forward. But Cell Biology and Organic; they have become so anxiety provoking; I get so scared to ask questions because I am just starting to think I am dimmer than others at this point. I don't know; sorry for the rant, just frustrated with myself at the moment; I want to rip out my brain and tell it to do better. The Cell Biology labs are worth 30%; and I have done so bad on 4 out of the 5. Like so bad. Like embarrassing bad.; I'll just expose myself (I got a 72 on the first one, 53 on the second one, 65 on the third one) each are worth 6 percent. So that's an average of 63 for 18 percent of my grade; that's equivalent to a midterms weight. I only have one more to go and the last one I don't even know at this point; no idea what to do.
  10. Recusitatorwannabe

    Maybe Someone Will Find This Helpful

    I really needed to hear this thank you; what’s the YouTube channel?
  11. Recusitatorwannabe

    Stress Survey

    Did it; note you didn't have my racial group there so maybe put other next time (middle eastern)
  12. When I was in hospital I was told I would never succeed in life and that I'm destined for failure; and that I shouldn't even try to graduate high school. I was told that University was not the place for me; because I was too weak. I believed it for a long time. But somehow I'm still here; every day is a lesson, but I just wanted honest opinions on my dreams based upon my grades and experiences. I wanted realistic comments about my chances, to see if there was something I was lacking that others have. Not to be told that I somehow think Medical School is the solution to my problems. I know it isn't; I'm very much aware. That's why I wanted opinions to tell me if I am capable of it; realistically. Anyways, this is what I get for revealing myself. I understand it's no one's problem, I apologize for putting my information out there. I do not want sympathy nor do I think I am in any way entitled to any type of sympathy, trust me thats the last thing I want. I was honestly just looking for honest opinions and advice.
  13. Recusitatorwannabe

    Advice?

    Thank you so much, did you look at textbook and lecture? Or just went into the textbook when you didn't understand something? Because I have my notes from lecture; and I use it on onenote so I'll have the lecture slides' then add onto that. But then I'll also add from the textbook; should I not be doing this? Because honestly a lot of the textbook wasn't on the midterms it was all from lecture slides.
  14. Recusitatorwannabe

    Should I fight for marks??

    I don’t like to downtalk TA’s but I honestly feel like the majority don’t want us to do well or simply don’t care. In organic chemistry I got a 97 on the midterm; but for my prelab quizzes I got 60 on one; and 40 on the other. She has no explanation just simple 0’s out of 3 and I’m confused about this because I did know what I was talking about: I didn’t go into the lab upreprared. I studied and everything so I don’t even know why it’s wrong; like some of my answers are word for word out of the lab manual. I have this problem where I’m too scared to fight for marks; so should I just get over it and fight for marks? Or do other premeds not generally do this. I just am tired of things like labs bringing down my overall mark which is exactly what happened last year. I email my TA’s and ask for help and go to their office and everything; and they always take forever to respond or seem annoyed with the questions, it’s discouraging.
  15. Isn’t it hard to get residency in Canada if I do that?
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