*Family friend as a reference

[Guest Ian Wong]

Author:*AC, UG4

Date:***9/15/2000 6:24 pm*PST

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Hi everybody!

 

I have been getting mixed reviews on having a family friend as one of my references. He is a well-respected physician whom I have known for a long time. Some people tell me that it's a really good choice, while others tell me to stick to people other than family friends and family doctors.

 

How do you guys feel?

 

Thanks

[Guest Ian Wong]

Author:*Simon Chiu, UG3

Date:***9/15/2000 8:34 pm*PST

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I don't think you should worry about this issue. Remember: The references are only there to show consistency between what you write about yourself in your biographical essays and to show the characteristics you possess which are not reflected on your transcripts.

 

This is the reason I did not choose all professors, as they would all only say the same thing about me academically. As a result, I do not think the choosing a family friend, who is a physician, will be a bad thing. Also remember that having a physician vouching for you is good.

 

Hope that helps.

[Guest Ian Wong]

Author:*Ian Wong, MS2

Date:***9/15/2000 8:49 pm*PST

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Hi,

 

I just wanted to echo Simon's thoughts. In fact, I did the same thing, and had a family friend, who also happens to be a specialist at the local hospital, write me a letter. This was part of the application that got me accepted at UBC, and another university.

 

In my opinion, it probably had a lot of weight, as it came from a doctor, and, more importantly, was chock-full of anecdotes that he had noticed as I grew up, that he thought demonstrated intellectual curiousity, and a suitability for medicine. One story that he told me he had included in the letter after I was accepted, was where I had disassembled a radio as a child to try to figure out how it worked. I never did get that radio back into working shape, but he was impressed with the amount of time I devoted to trying to fix it, in addition to the sheer interest in taking the wretched thing apart in the first place.

 

I say use the family friend. Remember, a reference letter doesn't necessarily have to be totally one-sided. I assume you are worried about the credibility issue of using a family friend. Ask your referee if he/she remembers any negatives in your past, and has if he/she will include them in the letter, while also explaining how you overcame them. This makes your letter less one-sided, and gives the adcom a better look into your character, which is the primary goal of the reference letter in the first place.

 

Ian

Can, MS2