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What's On Your Mind?


Robin Hood

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On my mind:

 

My mom died ten days ago. I'd been her caregiver for the past 6 months FT, and although she had a terminal illness, she died suddenly and I did not see it coming so fast -- neither did she, or the nurse who saw her that afternoon.

 

Why on earth am I posting this here??

 

I'm struggling with who to tell and how to tell them... my mom did not want a service or obituary, so it's very much on me to decide who finds out. In this age of social media I'm lost as to how to let my community know I am experiencing a loss without undermining my mom's privacy. I guess I feel comfortable posting here because I feel relatively anonymous... and I feel the need to start talking about it (beyond the few people my mom wanted me to notify).

 

Today's tasks involved picking up my mom's ashes, going to say goodbye to the members of the caregiver support group I had attended, making arrangements to travel to a place I can scatter the ashes, retrieving some medical records, reading condolences messages, and filling out the McMaster campus survey... 

 

</3

 

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know you've put so much into caring for her. If there's anything I can do to help, let me know. You've got my number. 

 

There's no right or wrong way to talk about it. You do what feels right for you. (hugs)

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Wow! I had no idea we had so many keen fish keepers of the forum! Any help would be appreciated.... (snip)

 

I don't have any experience with that sort of thing happening but I have a suspicion. You mention having an airstone and your bacteria setup: do you have a filter? For a 10 gallon tank, you should have a proper working filter. You could be getting ammonia buildup, particularly since it's a newer tank. The whole "new tank syndrome." Even if you're careful at the start, it can take a while to get your balance on ammonia handling. If you don't have an actual filter, I'd be worrying that the water changes aren't sufficient. 

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On my mind:

 

My mom died ten days ago. I'd been her caregiver for the past 6 months FT, and although she had a terminal illness, she died suddenly and I did not see it coming so fast -- neither did she, or the nurse who saw her that afternoon.

 

Why on earth am I posting this here??

 

I'm struggling with who to tell and how to tell them... my mom did not want a service or obituary, so it's very much on me to decide who finds out. In this age of social media I'm lost as to how to let my community know I am experiencing a loss without undermining my mom's privacy. I guess I feel comfortable posting here because I feel relatively anonymous... and I feel the need to start talking about it (beyond the few people my mom wanted me to notify).

 

Today's tasks involved picking up my mom's ashes, going to say goodbye to the members of the caregiver support group I had attended, making arrangements to travel to a place I can scatter the ashes, retrieving some medical records, reading condolences messages, and filling out the McMaster campus survey... 

 

</3

 

 

I am so very sorry for your loss. You are in a difficult situation. When it comes to choosing who to inform of your mother's passing and how to tell them I think it is admirable that you are trying to uphold your mother's wish for privacy. That being said, in the coming weeks and months if you need support from your community that is equally important. A grief counsellor might also be helpful in offering support and could potentially lend some support with this decision? 

 

Those of us on the forum are here for you if you need it. Would it be helpful to you if some of us offered suggestions as to how we might approach a similar situation? 

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I don't have any experience with that sort of thing happening but I have a suspicion. You mention having an airstone and your bacteria setup: do you have a filter? For a 10 gallon tank, you should have a proper working filter. You could be getting ammonia buildup, particularly since it's a newer tank. The whole "new tank syndrome." Even if you're careful at the start, it can take a while to get your balance on ammonia handling. If you don't have an actual filter, I'd be worrying that the water changes aren't sufficient. 

 

We do indeed have a filter, I should have put that in there. We have a filter that is the right size for the tank and we are following the prescribed maintenance cycles for it. I've been monitoring the ammonia and it cycled in the beginning so I treated with ammo lock until the bacteria colony was established... We had a bunch of fish growing up and didn't do anywhere near this much maintenance - how the heck did all those fish survive?!   :huh: So frustrating, but I appreciate any insight as you never know what will solve the mystery! Thank you for taking the time to ponder my fish problems  :)

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What about a space issue? If the fish have too much space to swim they can get aggressive with each other, which can cause them to be stressed and can even make them sick. I admittedly know nothing about the kinds of fish you have but it's just a thought that comes to mind.

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What about a space issue? If the fish have too much space to swim they can get aggressive with each other, which can cause them to be stressed and can even make them sick. I admittedly know nothing about the kinds of fish you have but it's just a thought that comes to mind.

Much more likely to be the other way around...

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Med student problems: Pregnant with severe asthma, having expected worsening of asthma symptoms, as with previous pregnancies. Unavoidable thought: "holy crap I'm going to die of a pulmonary embolism." Med school poses challenges for the anxious among us. 

 

 

 

We do indeed have a filter, I should have put that in there. We have a filter that is the right size for the tank and we are following the prescribed maintenance cycles for it. I've been monitoring the ammonia and it cycled in the beginning so I treated with ammo lock until the bacteria colony was established... We had a bunch of fish growing up and didn't do anywhere near this much maintenance - how the heck did all those fish survive?!   :huh: So frustrating, but I appreciate any insight as you never know what will solve the mystery! Thank you for taking the time to ponder my fish problems  :)

 

Sorry I can't help more. :( I hope it gets sorted and you don't lose any more fish. I found tanks to just require too much work so I just stopped keeping fish several years ago.

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I'm going to do an elective in interventional radiology this summer. I know I'm only a preclerk, but I want to arrive prepared and not be a complete idiot. I have zero exposure to interventional radiology and just a bit of general knowledge about what they do. Any recommendations of good resources?

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I'm going to do an elective in interventional radiology this summer. I know I'm only a preclerk, but I want to arrive prepared and not be a complete idiot. I have zero exposure to interventional radiology and just a bit of general knowledge about what they do. Any recommendations of good resources?

 

know your vascular anatomy :) They love to quiz that.

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I'm going to do an elective in interventional radiology this summer. I know I'm only a preclerk, but I want to arrive prepared and not be a complete idiot. I have zero exposure to interventional radiology and just a bit of general knowledge about what they do. Any recommendations of good resources?

I didn't know you can do electives before clerkship? Is that only at Mac?

 

Also birdy when does your clerkship start? I'm behind on your blog and haven't caught up yet (I'm around posts from Oct of 2015, but I will be catching up soon once I get some more free time). By the way your blog is so great and it was so exciting when I was last reading it, I love hearing about all the details of what med school is like.

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know your vascular anatomy :) They love to quiz that.

 

Well, it's a good thing I have until July to review. Thanks! 

 

I didn't know you can do electives before clerkship? Is that only at Mac?

 

Also birdy when does your clerkship start? I'm behind on your blog and haven't caught up yet (I'm around posts from Oct of 2015, but I will be catching up soon once I get some more free time). By the way your blog is so great and it was so exciting when I was last reading it, I love hearing about all the details of what med school is like.

 

We can do electives from October of first year. They're called horizontal electives and they're usually pretty short (I have one tomorrow in labour and delivery which is for 7 hours) but we have 7 weeks of elective time (and one week of vacation) in July and August of first year. I'm doing 3 weeks of family med and two weeks each of interventional radiology and dermatology. We can do basically any specialty that we can find a supervisor in. Many students are going overseas. I'm going back to PEI for part of it. 

 

 

 

My class starts clerkship at the end of November. It's exciting and a bit terrifying, at least for me.

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I'm going to do an elective in interventional radiology this summer. I know I'm only a preclerk, but I want to arrive prepared and not be a complete idiot. I have zero exposure to interventional radiology and just a bit of general knowledge about what they do. Any recommendations of good resources?

What a coincidence - I just came across Demystifying Interventional Radiology: A Guide for Medical Students

http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F978-3-319-17238-5

Written locally and available as an ebook through the McMaster library.

 

Also check out Interventional Radiology: A Survival Guide (Kessel) and Learning Vascular and Interventional Radiology (Munoz), both also available as ebooks through the library.

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What a coincidence - I just came across Demystifying Interventional Radiology: A Guide for Medical Students

http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F978-3-319-17238-5

Written locally and available as an ebook through the McMaster library.

 

Also check out Interventional Radiology: A Survival Guide (Kessel) and Learning Vascular and Interventional Radiology (Munoz), both also available as ebooks through the library.

Thank you so much!

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You're welcome. Thankful that our paths crossed, as I only open this thread on occasion.. and for the extensive ebook collections our libraries now provide! It's amazing how much is now available at the click of a mouse... access to information has changed so much from the not-too-distant days of card catalogues, encyclopedias, and photocopiers in the library basement.

Enjoy your elective - since most of the action in IR is on the screen, I find the view is better for onlookers than in the OR...

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Well it should be fun, anyway. I'll be 6 months pregnant while doing it so I'm sure some people will get a little nervous about me being there, but I already know the exposure is pretty low to begin with and I'll be making sure I wear appropriate shielding when necessary anyway.

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I spent the better part of my day yesterday at Calgary Humane Society sorting donations and getting plastic crates ready to ship to Fort Mac to help evacuate pets. I've worked at CHS for over 7 years and I've seen the best and worst that humanity has to offer. Yesterday I saw the very, very best. We received hundreds and hundreds of plastic crates that we were able to ship to Fort Mac and more will be going today. It was an incredible outpouring of generosity. So amazing to see. 

 

If you know of a Fort Mac evacuee that has landed in Calgary and needs help with pet supplies or needs emergency boarding for their pet because they cannot find a place to stay with their pet please encourage them to give CHS a call. 

 

To anyone from the Fort Mac area - I am so terribly sorry for what is happening right now. My hope is that you and all of your family members are safe. I have lived in Calgary most of my life, so if you have found yourself evacuated here and you need any information about the city please feel free to reach out. If I don't know the answer I will find someone in my network who does and get it to you.

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Hey no way! What a coincidence. I've volunteered with CHS for a few years (had to stop because I left the city for Uni), but will be starting as an adoptions counselor on Monday...

For anyone that's interested... here is a picture of what they managed to get in donations... Amazing. CHS has always been amazing in all aspects (I remember they did a lot during the floods as well), and it's great to see so many people helping out. For more context, as of around 8:06am yesterday, CHS put out a call for 600 kennels. The above picture was what they had a few hours later.

 

To anyone from the Fort Mac area - I am so terribly sorry for what is happening right now. My hope is that you and all of your family members are safe. I have lived in Calgary most of my life, so if you have found yourself evacuated here and you need any information about the city please feel free to reach out. If I don't know the answer I will find someone in my network who does and get it to you.

 

Agreed. If anyone needs help or a place to stay, PM as well. (I know this won't be the first place anyone looks, but if you know anyone, or if you need help, feel free to message me as well!). Sending positive vibes. 

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Hey no way! What a coincidence. I've volunteered with CHS for a few years (had to stop because I left the city for Uni), but will be starting as an adoptions counselor on Monday...

 

 

Seriously? So awesome! Adoptions is an awesome team and I'm sure you'll love it :-) I will have to figure out who you are!!!! I worked in adoptions years ago (I've held a couple of positions there) and I loved it! I had a great time meeting everyone and helping them find pets. 

 

Just FYI though... be prepared to be offered a LOT of donuts and cake! Those two things pop up a lot around there  :lol:

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Well it should be fun, anyway. I'll be 6 months pregnant while doing it so I'm sure some people will get a little nervous about me being there, but I already know the exposure is pretty low to begin with and I'll be making sure I wear appropriate shielding when necessary anyway.

 

make sure you also check out the radiation policies as well for that block :)

 

Some places have different rules about being pregnant during things

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Well, it's a good thing I have until July to review. Thanks! 

 

 

We can do electives from October of first year. They're called horizontal electives and they're usually pretty short (I have one tomorrow in labour and delivery which is for 7 hours) but we have 7 weeks of elective time (and one week of vacation) in July and August of first year. I'm doing 3 weeks of family med and two weeks each of interventional radiology and dermatology. We can do basically any specialty that we can find a supervisor in. Many students are going overseas. I'm going back to PEI for part of it. 

 

 

 

My class starts clerkship at the end of November. It's exciting and a bit terrifying, at least for me.

That sounds like so much fun! Granted its a tonne of studying but how satisfying would it be to put the knowledge into practical use! Can't wait to hear how IR and derm go, mostly because I don't know a lot about those specialties.

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