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significant others


Guest tipharet 09

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Guest tipharet 09

How are other people making the CaRMS decisions when a significant other is involved? Are you using some kind of formula (like he picks the top 3 and you put them in order, or vice versa)? Or are you discussing the whole rank order list one by one?

Any advice specifically for "if" there's disagreement over where to go?

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Guest RAK2005

I went one-by-one. My significant other has vested job interests in each city and we tried to weigh city (for her), city (for me) and program/lifestyle when ranking. It was not too hard for the top three, although we often flip-flop our lower positions.

 

Regardless, not everyone agrees and it is a pretty stressful time especially if they are in meds !

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Guest jmh2005

OH...this is what has been keeping me up for the past several nights!!!

 

You need to balance both parties and keep everyone happy. For instance, what I would rank if I was single would be very different from what I am actually going to rank...I would go out West, no question...but we can't do that.

 

I made a spreadsheet of my top 4 schools on the top, things that are important to me with respect to the program, the cities, employment for my husband, amenities, electives, administration, flexibility, family, etc on the left hand side. I checked off things and rated it excellent, OK, poor... It was a good way to compare the programs looking at very specific criteria.

 

It's about finding a fit for you AND your partner when you are in this situation...

 

Good luck...still a few more weeks until we need to make the big decision!

 

J

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest tipharet 09

Thanks guys!

Sometimes it helps just to know other people are struggling with the same thing.

jmh, when you say your rank list would look much different if you were single, I feel the same way.

Oh well, the stuggle continues:\

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