I just don't toot my own horn

[orange123]

Hello everyone

 

So, I have quite a serious predicament. I'm super modest, very shy, and more of a listener than a talker. I just let everyone talk about themselves, and only rarely does anyone ask me about me, at which time I'm caught off guard and never have anything spectacular to say. Even though I do have a lot of good experiences that will make me stand out (probably--I hope).

 

So how should I go around this little issue? I really would like to come out of my shell. And learn to talk about myself more. Except I'm just afraid that people will think of me as pushy, or narcissistic. And yes, I do realise that if it's done artfully no one will think I"m obsessed with myself (which I'm not! I can assure you). Everytime I try, it sounds too foreign, and it's out of my comfort zone.

 

Any advice? Thoughts? Comments? Tonnes of practice? Thanks!

[Lactic Folly]

Is this concern mainly to do with interviews? If so, interviews are a rather artificial situation, and preparing for an interview is like preparing for a talk - lots and lots of practice. I find it easier to talk about myself in an interview, since the interviewers will not be talking about themselves. Rather, all their attention will be focused on you and what you have to say.. and you don't want to disappoint them! The book Brag! by Peggy Klaus might be a worthwhile read.

[astrogirl]

Just practice a lot. Practice with friends. Tell them that you need to practice talking about yourself, and then ask them for feedback after you're done. And I've noticed that the people who worry about sounding pushy are never the people who actually do sound pushy, so maybe take some comfort in that.

[orange123]

Thanks Lactic folly and astrogirl

 

Will look into Brag too, and practice lots and lots! Interviews make me feel queasy. Like I'm being judged, which I probably am and rightfully so.

[doctulk]

Thanks Lactic folly and astrogirl

 

Will look into Brag too, and practice lots and lots! Interviews make me feel queasy. Like I'm being judged, which I probably am and rightfully so.

 

Hey orange123,

 

I know exactly what are you talking about it. I am shy and modest as well. I had a meeting with a physician at the hospital in my community and he told me that it is absolutely essential to sell yourself to the interviewing committee. Toot that horn the best you can; just don't be arrogant about it.

 

Best of luck

[aKGDH]

You must sell yourself during the interview. Modesty or shyness is no excuse, especially considering how important the interview is (to you). Come out of your shell but do it professionally ....And don't worry about sounding arrogant. If you do not intend to be arrogant, it will most likely not come off as such.

[Guest viscous]

I used to be extremely modest and humble 5 years ago. Now, from personal experiences that life have taught, I am continuously on my way to this "tooting my own horn" thing because I will not survive otherwise. Its a competitive world. You HAVE to be moderately obsessed about the good that you have and present it to the world so that their perception of you is not based on their own biases. I consider modesty to be a very good religious quality but one also has to acquire the necessary tools to survive within a different society and tooting one's horn in a positive way is a necessary pre-requisite, especially when it relates to the sensitive nature Ontario medical school interviews.

 

Best of luck.