leap87 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 I've done the 4 months thing, and recently. Why do you think I am the way I am? And that was after several years of dating. Granted we were LD and it was medication induced, but that didn't make it any easier. Just doing it on purpose? That's no fun for anybody - sex is not a weapon, sex is a fun and glorious recreational activity. Trust me... Been there, done that. It's not as glorious when you don't really like the person. Physical only doesn't cut it for me anymore. Never actually did when I think about it. It's not about using it as a weapon. It's about connecting with the person on many more levels - not just physical. Honestly, 90% of "relationships" fall apart because the 2 have sex prematurely... I know of a handful that started as sex and turned into a relationship. The rest just fell apart... wonder why?! Edit: All I can say is that I learned my lesson and I will never repeat the same mistakes again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarathonRunner Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Trust me... Been there, done that. It's not as glorious when you don't really like the person. Physical only doesn't cut it for me anymore. Never actually did when I think about it. It's not about using it as a weapon. It's about connecting with the person on many more levels - not just physical. Honestly, 90% of "relationships" fall apart because the 2 have sex prematurely... I know of a handful that started as sex and turned into a relationship. The rest just fell apart... wonder why?! Agreed! I also knew plenty of women during my undergrad years who would try to keep a relationship going by using sex. That's just so wrong, on so many levels. There are (even if today's day in age) plenty of people who wait until marriage before having sex. And you know what? Those marriages work out just fine. Those relationships are often built on true friendship, companionship and love, and that's what will get you through the ups and downs of life together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 On a completely different note than the current conversation going on here, I need some help. A friend mentioned that he's looking forward to a book comming out, so I'm going to buy it for his birthday. Problem is that I can't remember what the book was (I should have written it down). I know that it's from a series, and the books are each fairly long. I think they're like high fantasy type books. That's all I've got; any ideas? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hking03 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Trust me... Been there, done that. It's not as glorious when you don't really like the person. Physical only doesn't cut it for me anymore. Never actually did when I think about it. It's not about using it as a weapon. It's about connecting with the person on many more levels - not just physical. Honestly, 90% of "relationships" fall apart because the 2 have sex prematurely... I know of a handful that started as sex and turned into a relationship. The rest just fell apart... wonder why?! Edit: All I can say is that I learned my lesson and I will never repeat the same mistakes again. Leap, I find your blanket statement about relationships amusing. I think that when you are 16-20 waiting to have sex is an important part of the relationship, especially for young women- why rush into something if you don't feel comfortable with it. Once you become an adult it is something that needs to be discussed with both parties. If you don't want to have sex for 4 months, tell the guy or girl. If they like you enough then they will stick around, but don't use it as some crutch or weapon saying that "a healthy relationship can't be based on sex" or "if we have sex too early our relationship is doomed". I'm not trying to change anybody's opinion on this, just sharing mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kylamonkey Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Yes... That's how you keep them and make sure you don't make a stupid mistake. Edit: Call me crazy, but why would I give a man what he's after in the first couple of weeks of a dating period? They love the chase. So let them chase.... It's not always just a man that's interested in sex, women can have an interest too. Turning it into a power struggle and a denial/permission thing can most certainly have consequences. On a completely different note than the current conversation going on here, I need some help. A friend mentioned that he's looking forward to a book comming out, so I'm going to buy it for his birthday. Problem is that I can't remember what the book was (I should have written it down). I know that it's from a series, and the books are each fairly long. I think they're like high fantasy type books. That's all I've got; any ideas? BZZZZ... paging Dr. Cerena, paging Dr. Cerena. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hking03 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 On a completely different note than the current conversation going on here, I need some help. A friend mentioned that he's looking forward to a book comming out, so I'm going to buy it for his birthday. Problem is that I can't remember what the book was (I should have written it down). I know that it's from a series, and the books are each fairly long. I think they're like high fantasy type books. That's all I've got; any ideas? how many books are in the series? was it George RR Martin? Game of Thrones-Dance With Dragons, will be released on July 12, 2011. that one is supposed to be 900 pages long and is the talk of the town. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Agreed! I also knew plenty of women during my undergrad years who would try to keep a relationship going by using sex. That's just so wrong, on so many levels. There are (even if today's day in age) plenty of people who wait until marriage before having sex. And you know what? Those marriages work out just fine. Those relationships are often built on true friendship, companionship and love, and that's what will get you through the ups and downs of life together. My two best friends waited until marriage. They're getting married in the summer and they're happier than ever before. What I learned from their relationship was that there are other ways to express your love for one another... and IMO, they're far deeper than just sleeping together. I agree 100%. Leap, I find your blanket statement about relationships amusing. I think that when you are 16-20 waiting to have sex is an important part of the relationship, especially for young women- why rush into something if you don't feel comfortable with it. Once you become an adult it is something that needs to be discussed with both parties. If you don't want to have sex for 4 months, tell the guy or girl. If they like you enough then they will stick around, but don't use it as some crutch or weapon saying that "a healthy relationship can't be based on sex" or "if we have sex too early our relationship is doomed". I'm not trying to change anybody's opinion on this, just sharing mine. I didn't say that it shouldn't be discussed. That wasn't my point. My point was that there are OTHER ways of expressing what you feel for another. I believe that sex is far more powerful when two people are actually in love, respect one another on a whole different level and have been through a little bit in their relationship. If you have sex early on in the relationship, you don't yet know this person that well. If you're solely in it for the pleasure, than great. I'm not saying there's something wrong with pleasure. All I'm saying, that if you want a relationship with someone, sex might not necessarily be the most important aspect of that relationship. Like I said above, 2 of my friends have been together for almost 4 years and didn't have sex. They're getting married in the summer. Looking at them, sometimes it feels like their relationship is far deeper than what I've seen before (and it's not only me saying this... it's most of our friends). All I'm saying is that you can, and I know this for a fact, make one another happy in a different kind of way...without jumping into sex right away. Tis' all. Like I said, been there, done that. And looking back, the relationships which were built on other things lasted. The ones which started off physical, ended within 6 months. Maybe it's just me.... I get easily bored... I like the chase. Even in the relationship. It's not always just a man that's interested in sex, women can have an interest too. Turning it into a power struggle and a denial/permission thing can most certainly have consequences. I'm not saying one or the other aren't interested. I'm saying there are other ways to make one another happy. It's not a power struggle if both parties are on the same page. That's why being open from the get go and communicating are the 2 most important aspects of any relationship. Edit: Just to add: I reached a point where I'm not interested in having sex without the emotional aspect to it. I'm not interested anymore into picking up a stranger at a party/bar and having the night of my life; or kind of liking someone and then sleeping with them; or being just physically attracted to them and sleeping with them. It's not enough for me anymore. It was before... but something changed a couple of months ago. Maybe it was because of my friends... maybe it was because of bad experiences... or I matured in this kind of way. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion though. I don't judge those that pick up people at the bar or sleep with a different person every day or start a relationship with sex... it's their life in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehumanmacbook Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 My two best friends waited until marriage. They're getting married in the summer and they're happier than ever before. What I learned from their relationship was that there are other ways to express your love for one another... and IMO, they're far deeper than just sleeping together. I agree 100%. I didn't say that it shouldn't be discussed. That wasn't my point. My point was that there are OTHER ways of expressing what you feel for another. I believe that sex is far more powerful when two people are actually in love, respect one another on a whole different level and have been through a little bit in their relationship. If you have sex early on in the relationship, you don't yet know this person that well. If you're solely in it for the pleasure, than great. I'm not saying there's something wrong with pleasure. All I'm saying, that if you want a relationship with someone, sex might not necessarily be the most important aspect of that relationship. Like I said above, 2 of my friends have been together for almost 4 years and didn't have sex. They're getting married in the summer. Looking at them, sometimes it feels like their relationship is far deeper than what I've seen before (and it's not only me saying this... it's most of our friends). All I'm saying is that you can, and I know this for a fact, make one another happy in a different kind of way...without jumping into sex right away. Tis' all. Like I said, been there, done that. And looking back, the relationships which were built on other things lasted. The ones which started off physical, ended within 6 months. Maybe it's just me.... I get easily bored... I like the chase. Even in the relationship. I'm not saying one or the other aren't interested. I'm saying there are other ways to make one another happy. It's not a power struggle if both parties are on the same page. That's why being open from the get go and communicating are the 2 most important aspects of any relationship. Edit: Just to add: I reached a point where I'm not interested in having sex without the emotional aspect to it. I'm not interested anymore into picking up a stranger at a party/bar and having the night of my life; or kind of liking someone and then sleeping with them; or being just physically attracted to them and sleeping with them. It's not enough for me anymore. It was before... but something changed a couple of months ago. Maybe it was because of my friends... maybe it was because of bad experiences... or I matured in this kind of way. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion though. I don't judge those that pick up people at the bar or sleep with a different person every day or start a relationship with sex... it's their life in the end. I like having friends with benefits. But when they ask you if you want a relationship then it kinda ruins the point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 how many books are in the series? was it George RR Martin? Game of Thrones-Dance With Dragons, will be released on July 12, 2011. that one is supposed to be 900 pages long and is the talk of the town. That looks like it's the book he was talking about. Thanks! You win a prize...um...a baby penguin being tickled Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mm88 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 http://devour.com/video/trick-shot-doctor/ AWESOME Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GGGSaint Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 Like I said above, 2 of my friends have been together for almost 4 years and didn't have sex. They're getting married in the summer. Looking at them, sometimes it feels like their relationship is far deeper than what I've seen before (and it's not only me saying this... it's most of our friends). I definitely see your point about there being the emotional aspect to sex as well. That said, just wanted to highlight the quote above and say this: Hopefully the marriage between your two friends works out but honestly...getting married before knowing what the sex life is like may be a mistake/lead to an unhappy marriage. Sex is not everything...but it is pretty important to a successful relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 http://devour.com/video/trick-shot-doctor/ AWESOME Neat. But that video looks doctored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehumanmacbook Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 http://devour.com/video/trick-shot-doctor/ AWESOME That is what we should learn in medical school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 I like having friends with benefits. But when they ask you if you want a relationship then it kinda ruins the point. Exactly my point. If you want friends with benefits, it's a whole different story. You start with sex and end with it. If you want a relationship, there's a whole other twist to it. I definitely see your point about there being the emotional aspect to sex as well. That said, just wanted to highlight the quote above and say this: Hopefully the marriage between your two friends works out but honestly...getting married before knowing what the sex life is like may be a mistake/lead to an unhappy marriage. Sex is not everything...but it is pretty important to a successful relationship. We will see how it works out. However, I highly doubt these 2 will ever separate. IMO, they were truly meant to be together. But I see what you're saying. I necessarily wouldn't enter a marriage without having sex before but I would also not have sex in the first couple of months of a relationship. However, you can work on sex, just like anything else in the relationship. If there is will and love, there is a way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hking03 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 That is what we should learn in medical school. you mean... we don't learn that in medical school? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charmer08 Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 had the iced hazelnut latte from second cup... was terrible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehumanmacbook Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 My money is dedicated to three major things: food, clothes, and video games. It's sad when I had to sell some of my collectors items for MCAT books. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C2MD Posted April 19, 2011 Report Share Posted April 19, 2011 lol, too funny http://devour.com/video/trick-shot-doctor/AWESOME On another note, I've had nothing to do since Sunday 4pm... Slept through Monday, but now I'm BORED!!!! C Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarathonRunner Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Hopefully the marriage between your two friends works out but honestly...getting married before knowing what the sex life is like may be a mistake/lead to an unhappy marriage. Sex is not everything...but it is pretty important to a successful relationship. It don't think it is necessary to have sex before marriage. Speaking for myself, I waited until I was married, and I don't regret it at all. (My husband wasn't a virgin, but he respected my decision to wait.) My husband and I have a wonderful, loving relationship and, well, without getting too personal, our love life couldn't be better. We are not only lovers, but best friends. Sex, after all, isn't rocket science or neurosurgery. If you are open and honest with each other, it is pretty easy to make sure you are both happy and satisfied. I suppose if one person wanted certain things that the other wasn't open to, it could lead to problems, but that's why it's important to be best friends and to be open to talking about everything with your partner before marriage. But to each their own. What works for some people certainly wouldn't work for others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 There's nothing quite like white grape juice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Oh man... I don't remember the last time I've been this nervous... 1 hour and 27 mins to go.... And I'm ****ting bricks... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larrivee Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Oh man... I don't remember the last time I've been this nervous... 1 hour and 27 mins to go.... And I'm ****ting bricks... Why you so nervous leap? Got only today to study for psych final tomorrow and I still can't get motivated... aghagsdfwaef Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Why you so nervous leap? Got only today to study for psych final tomorrow and I still can't get motivated... aghagsdfwaef Motivation: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Oh man... I don't remember the last time I've been this nervous... 1 hour and 27 mins to go.... And I'm ****ting bricks...Presentation? Date? This could mean a number of things, Leap! Freezing rain today...and they said Spring was comming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larrivee Posted April 20, 2011 Report Share Posted April 20, 2011 Or were you saying that in 1 hr 27min you will be ****ting bricks, and that is the reason for your nervousness. ****ing bricks definitely does not sound like fun and I do not envy you. Try to relax as the bricks come out to allow for easier passage. My dad had to pass kidney stones and I though that that would suck... I should tell him to be thankful it was just little salt crystals and not bricks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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