dilemma - Advice wanted :)!

[doctorbetty]

I've wanted to be a doctor for as long as I can remember. I was invited to an interview a couple years ago, but my bf and I nearly broke up over it. In the end I wasn't accepted, and I decided to become an R.N. instead (after much coaxing from my b/f). Fast forward a few years ..... I am not very happy in the R.N. program. With a bachelor of science degree (2006), I am constantly trying to connect old learning with what I am learning now... but most 'detail' in this program is frowned upon. For example, I was told that 'diabetic ketoacidosis' is too 'technical' to discuss in a group. Most patho is also considered too 'detailed.' For the entire scenario on diabetes, we focussed instead on Aboriginal issues, which don't get me wrong is important, but so is physiology!!! In any case, I am constantly being told that I pay too much attention to detail, but that does not change my DESIRE to focus on it.........

 

So I've decided to apply to medical school again. I know this may sound irresponsible, but I finally realize that I will not be happy doing anything else. My b/f is not too happy, but he has considered the idea of me working for the next year (instead of going to nursing school). The problem is that I won't know if I will actually be accepted to med school until next year. I don't think it's the best idea to quit nursing school, but at the same time it doesn't make sense to complete my 3rd year if I want medicine instead. (I could be making money in the next year, which would help us out. Nursing school is a real stress for us because I do not even qualify for a student loan - he makes too much. But this would be a bad move if I do not get accepted..... HELP!!!!! please .

 

In any case, I hope someone can offer a few bites of advice.

[GLO]

I think your relationship issues are more worrisome at the moment.

 

The 20s called, they want their women's lifestyle back.

[Cop2Doc]

I've wanted to be a doctor for as long as I can remember. I was invited to an interview a couple years ago, but my bf and I nearly broke up over it. In the end I wasn't accepted, and I decided to become an R.N. instead (after much coaxing from my b/f). Fast forward a few years ..... I am not very happy in the R.N. program.

 

The fact that you received an interview suggests you're a fairly competitive applicant and you clearly have a desire to become a doctor. I would apply as soon as possible. I don't think your decision to reapply to medical school is irresponsible at all. That sounds like a tough decision, and I believe you made the right choice. Only you can weigh the risk/benefit of continuing with your nursing degree. Since you can't say for certain when exactly you will be accepted, nursing might be a great job while you wait. As frustrating as the lack of detail may be, nursing will still offer you some great clinical experience. The work experience itself can only help your application. If your having financial difficulty, I can see why you might see getting a job as more appealing.

 

Your obviously motivated and seem to have a real passion for medicine; however, there is something in your post that concerns me. As GLO mentioned, with the information you provided, it sounds like you have some significant relationship issues.

 

Compromise in a relationship should be about the colour you decide to paint the bedroom, not your career. If you allow your boyfriend to choose your career, your making yourself a victim.

 

When you allow someone else to direct your life, the end result is often unhappiness. I'm hoping you'll take your boyfriend pushing you into nursing as a learning experience. I'm not saying you have to break up with the guy, but stand up for yourself. Relationships are complex, and it might be tough to tell him that your committed to becoming a doctor. If he doesn't want to budge on the issue, you'll have to make a choice: happiness, or your boyfriend. If it comes down to that, I hope you tell him to pound sand and have a nice life.

[future_doc]

Never let a man push you around and tell you what to do. You need to be true to yourself and live life with no regrets. I would consider staying with nursing as Plan B while working toward the goal of med. If your b/f is not supportive of your goals, he is not your "friend" rather he has his own agenda that does not complement where you are heading and he is not worth it. Who said life is supposed to be easy? Do what you have to do!

[kylamonkey]

DTMFA

 

(10char)

[champ]

DTMFA

 

(10char)

 

DTMFA?

 

10 char

[thatonekid]

DTMFA?

 

10 char

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=DTMFA

[*Pixie*]

Stand your ground. If your relationship fails for some other reason 10 years from now you would be devastated to realize that you have invested all this time and money into your relationship that failed anyway. Instead do something that would keep you happy no matter what the relationship is like.

Being married myself I know just how hard it is to work these things out. I lived with now my husband (back then my boyfriend) all the way through my undergrad in science and had to take out a student loan as well as work part-time while taking a full course load. He always knew that I wanted to be a doctor and I have already applied unsuccessfully once and didn't get in. I am applying again with hope that it will happen this time around. Anyway, my husband has been supportive all along but since he doesn't make a million a year I will have to take out a loan to cover med school costs and pay off my student loan from my undergrad. The bank will definitely look at the fact that I am married and will have my husband's income in mind when giving me my loan but I am 100% sure they will give me one. The main factor that qualifies you for it is THE ADMISSION LETTER. They will give you a line of credit for any sum $150,00-$200,000. So even if you have to cover %50 of all the living expenses you would be able to do so no problem. Yes, you'll have to pay the bank back whatever you ended up using from your credit line, but at least you are not starving while in med school and its all so worth it in the long run. If your boyfriend doesn't understand that as a doctor one day you will be making around $200,000 a year or more and that the school is an investment.... I don't need to comment on it.

Also, you are in a good situation to begin with: of you don't get in on the next cycle, you can continue in nursing and just keep applying until you get in. All the best to you, and make your years count.

[DOC_Ma]

DTMFA?

 

10 char

 

Holy smokes, i actually guessed it right!

[hastin11]

Never let a man push you around and tell you what to do. You need to be true to yourself and live life with no regrets. I would consider staying with nursing as Plan B while working toward the goal of med. If your b/f is not supportive of your goals, he is not your "friend" rather he has his own agenda that does not complement where you are heading and he is not worth it. Who said life is supposed to be easy? Do what you have to do!

 

I usually find platitudes like this annoying, but in this case, it is spot on. I realize I dont know anything about the guy, but this screams "he doesnt want you in a powerful career."

 

By interviewing, you ALMOST GOT IN to meds--and he encourages you to do an RN?!?!? This makes my head want to explode. There is no reason why he would encourage that and still have your best interests at heart.