JeepPatriot Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 Hello everyone, I have applied for Fall'12 and I am currently in the excruciating waiting situation. In the mean time, something peculiar happened at my work place. Specifically, some colleagues think that I'm "too nice" to be a doctor(?). When I asked them to elaborate, they said that I need to be a little more arrogant and narcissistic to be one, because it's such a cut-throat environment. At first I was appalled, but then, if i remember from my own experience, it is true that most of the doctors I have met (i.e., who have treated me) were indeed very cold and often downright rude. What's with that? Did they watch too much House? In any case, I was wondering if I should undergo a "personality change" if I get in, just not to be 'eaten alive'.. What is your personal experience, as med students? What's the deal? If I need to be a little more rude, I'll be. Thank you in advance for your help! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A-Stark Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 I really don't think you need to worry about these kinds of comments. There are lots of nice people on medicine and if you're friendly and easy to work with you'll have a good experience in clerkship and beyond. Overall med school has been anything but cutthroat, and while I can't say that we're lacking for people who are narcissistic and/or arrogant, most people are nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandibular Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 not always true. on the contrary, the majority of doctors I've met are very nice people Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lactic Folly Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 At first I thought that "too nice" may be code for too passive or lacking in confidence, which may detract from your effectiveness as a physician. Could this be what they meant? But if they actually said "arrogant and narcissistic", these traits would be anything but helpful in a physician. Certainly not something I would encourage you to aspire to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astrogirl Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 They have been watching too much TV. You need to be assertive and confident (and you will learn how to be those things if you aren't already), but there's no such thing as too nice. I'm actually kind of shocked at how incredibly nice almost everyone in the medical profession seems to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmorelan Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 Not only do nice people get into medicine they can do very well! There are times when you have to assertive though - you have to make sure that niceness is not confused with weakness. Some people don't initially get that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
future_doc Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 These people must be confused, they probably were thinking of lawyers, lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmorelan Posted February 11, 2012 Report Share Posted February 11, 2012 because it's such a cut-throat environment I guess I should ask where this perception is coming from as well? Who exactly are you competing with? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 In any case, I was wondering if I should undergo a "personality change" if I get in, just not to be 'eaten alive'.. Lol no, don't do that. We need more nice physicians. I'm sick and tired of switching referrals because some doctors are such a$$es Your co workers sound nutty, no offence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeepPatriot Posted February 18, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Thank you, everyone, for the reassuring replies! I can be assertive when needed, no problem, but I just hate to be rude, it's not in my nature. I'm glad to hear that I may not need to be an @ss, after all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medaholic Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 Niceness is a good thing to have, but it also helps to have a thick-skin and some toughness. Being able to handle stressful situations is also a key thing to have. so it's good to be nice to other people, but you also have to look out for yourself and make sure people don't walk all over you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chantalle47 Posted March 5, 2012 Report Share Posted March 5, 2012 JeepPatriot, I had a 'friend' tell me the EXACT same thing last year before I got in. They told me that I was too nice and too emotional to be a good doctor, and, given a choice they would rather have a skilled but insincere/arrogant/douchebag doctor treating them. Seriously, who are these people and where do they get their information from?! (oh, right, TV). Though I must confess that I too would choose a more skilled doctor over a less skilled one, I must ask: why would kindness necessarily imply a lack of skill? I do not believe that compassion and competency have to be mutually exclusive- don't let people tell you otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmorelan Posted March 5, 2012 Report Share Posted March 5, 2012 Niceness is a good thing to have, but it also helps to have a thick-skin and some toughness. Being able to handle stressful situations is also a key thing to have. so it's good to be nice to other people, but you also have to look out for yourself and make sure people don't walk all over you. those aren't mutually exclusive either though One of my favourite movie quotes is to never confuse niceness with weakness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astrogirl Posted March 5, 2012 Report Share Posted March 5, 2012 those aren't mutually exclusive either though One of my favourite movie quotes is to never confuse niceness with weakness. + A million to this. I am a very patient and friendly person, and it takes a lot to make me angry. 99% of the people I know have probably never seen me get mad about anything. And some people assume that means they can push me around or walk all over me (or mistreat other people when I'm around). They find out pretty quickly that they can't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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