If Medicine Really Worth It

[FreudianMarxist]

I guess the title already hints at what I wanna talk about. But I just started university and for the longest time, my heart has been set on medicine. I loved the thought of helping people out and simply being a leader in change when it came to science, research and healthcare. However, for the past year, as I see more and more doctors, I come to see that this is only in my own imagination that the medical career is noble.

I was just diagnosed with hypothyroid and put on high dosage synthroid. It's cause was discovered to be hashimotos, much like the large chunk of other hypothyroid cases. Now I don't know what it was but my second blood panel started showing extremely high estrogen and from there I started developing gynocomastia. Went to see a plastic surgeon and she ended up charging me 2 grand just to get my own hormonal levels back to normal (something you would expect our free health care to cover). On top of that, my own memory and attentiveness has worsened due to brain fog and I'm still gaining weight. In fact, I have even started having migraines. So not only am I a 17 year old boy with hypothyroid, a disease that impacts women around menopause, but now I also can't eat without feeling sick and keep getting headaches all the time.

My point is, this has been going on for a year and it's only getting worse. My endocrinologist won't listen and my family doctor doesn't do anything but tell me to talk to my endo. All the while, my health is going in the toilet. That is not what I expected the medical career to be.

Is this what I would become? I can't help but think that. Not to mention, I have to be extremely competitive the entire time while putting in more work on my health and my education, due to previously mentioned complications, while also volunteering and working on other ECs. Honestly, going through this website alone I see a bunch of people who are making their own organizations an programs and everything and I am a mere insignificant speck of dust when the comparison is made in corporation and benevolence.

So is it worth me being this hard on myself when Ontario continues to cut residency opportunities and further places caps on doctors? Or am I better off trying to find a second passion? To be honest this is all I see myself in but at the same time, I don't think I can ever get there.....

[RicardoKaká]

Tough that you have been going through health issues at such a young age and that your experience with the healthcare system hasn't been the greatest so far.

 

With that being said, you can become the physician that you want to be, treat all your patients with care and offer all advice possible on their treatment options and be there to support them. The way others treat you doesn't have to be the way you treat others.

 

I am not in medical school, but my journey getting there has been challenging. I have had rough goes at the MCAT, a lot of family stuff going on at the time I was studying hard in UG and many sacrifices that had to be made and will have to be made in the future.

 

In the end the decision is yours, it will not be easy, especially with your medical condition. But you can do it if you set your heart on it. You don't have to be the cream of the crop to get into medical school, you just have to have the passion, and the work-ethic to put in the work that is needed to achieve a seat in this country.

[Mjacob45]

I just wanted to add that if you feel like your endo is not listening to you, you can ask your family doctor for a referral to a different one. I had a different issue that required seeing an endo and didn't like the one I initially saw, so I got a referral to a different one who I found much better for my particular health concern. 

[FreudianMarxist]

Thank you to both of you. But MDHopefulyMe, from the people that are sharing their accepted statistics and what not, it really does seem like they got in because they were such stunning applicants with high GPAs and insane ECs. As for my endo, he was a paediatric endocrinologist and I'm turning 18 soon so I have to get a referral for an adult endocrinologist anyway, but I do thank you for the input

[Fresh fry]

I will bite because this is something that had been a central theme throughout med school for me.

 

1) We would all like to think that people get into medicine for noble reasons, and when we are interviewing everyone plays the part. "I want to advance (insert random cause here) and be a role model" "I want to be at the forefront of human science and technology" "I want to cure (insert random disease here) that affected my second cousin twice removed". The reality is much different. From my experience people get into medicine for a varying combination of the following reasons: 

 

1) Steady and secure job with great pay and portability

2) Respect from society

3) Respect from parents/girlfriend/boyfriend/best friend/high school guidance counselor who said you would never amount to anything

4) Parents are forcing me

5) I want a job where I think and don't get my hands dirty

6) I like gross things and I want to cut into people

7) I like power

8) I want to do something that has meaning/purpose

9) I want people to think I am smart

10) I want to help people*

 

* This is always the first thing that people say and it is always the first thing that goes by the wayside. Personally I think when people are forced to really examine this motive there isn't much depth to it. If you want to "help people" (and not you personally but people in general) why does it have to be medicine? Why not psychology, PT/OT, resp therapy, non-medical stuff like working for an NGO or social work. Everyone on this forum will say that this is their number one reason why they follow this path but I got to tell you when someone is on hour 22 of a 30 hour call shift and they are called to see a patient, or to make it a bit more relevant to you, when someone is in clinic and they are trying to get through 20-40 patients so they can pay the bills and keep the lights on, it is rarely the "desire to help people" that keeps them going. It is all the other things on the list, and most of the time it is all about the Benjamins. 

 

Now this is coming from someone who has just been on a month of night shifts in a major city's ER, and I fully admit I am a bit burnt and bitter, but this is a longstanding trend I have observed. 

 

Everyone comes into medical school thinking "I will be the one who is different, I am going to get through all this and stay true to my ideals and principles" yet I can only think of a handful of docs I have come across who I would safely say have maintained a noble perspective. Medschool and residency changes people and strips away the veneer of false motives. What comes out on the other side is usually not the ideal. Again this is not always the case.

 

I remember a resident I met on a rotation when I was a 1st year med student. I thought she was the best person I had ever come across. Did a masters, big on refugee health care, big on women's health. She was in 1st year of residency. Took time to teach, took time to talk to every patient and make sure they understood everything, called families at home. Advance 3 years and I am on rotation and she is a senior resident. Total 180. 3 years of being perpetually tired, abused by patients and preceptors, and never leaving the hospital broke her. She was like every other surgical senior resident: hard as nails with zero patience for anything or anyone. It is something I am watching play out again in real time as my friends advance through residency. I distinctly recall mourning the day a close friend matched to gen surge because I knew she would be a different person on the other side and I am sad to say I already hate how bitter and jaded she has become 2 years in.

 

I personally believe that everyone who gets into this wants to be good at it regardless of their motives. I think almost everyone wants to do the right thing in most situations. But I think that the system is broken and the weight of the world crushes most peoples idealism and the only thing that keeps them going is the more baser desires. The few who are the exceptions to the rule are truly remarkable people and if you ever come across one do all that you can to learn from them and keep them in your life. 

 

2) Now with respect to your condition.

 

Take your family doc for example. They have the shortest and easiest residencies. Family medicine usually attracts the more bubbly and idealistic students because it involves spending your day working with patients and their families. However, some pick family med because it is the easiest and most portable vocation. It is no secret that they don't get paid very well compared to other specialties, meaning if you want to make money you need to see as many patients as possible in a day. Most fee for service is set up on a 15 minute billing code. So they get paid X amount to see a patient for 15 minutes. If it is a complicated patient or there is something extra to be done they can charge extra (to the province) for things like a pap, or to remove stitches, etc. For most patients they can only charge the basic 15 minute rate. Working 8 hours a day means 32 patients if it works like clock work. To make any real money you need to see >40 patients in a day so some aren't getting their full 15 minutes. Others are going to take up more than their 15 and so that eats into the schedule too.

 

So you come to the office with a complicated complaint related to something that requires a specialist. Your family doctor has a very basic knowledge of how to treat complex endocrine disorders, that is why we have endocrinologists. How long does it take for you to tell them what is wrong? How long to examine? How long to chart? Now you have a problem that they don't know a lot about and have to try to look stuff up, how much can you learn about a complex endocrinopathy in 15 minutes? in 5 minutes? Not enough to treat someone effectively. Your family doc is saying to themselves "I don't know how to treat this person, they have a specialist who knows, why are they coming to see me about something I can't fix? The specialist will know how what to do. Are they dying? No, they can wait to see their specialist". 

 

Now you see your specialist, and this is the big disconnect between physicians and society. What you think is an emergency or urgent is not the same as what they do. You think "this is really affecting my life, I am suffering, I need help, why won't anyone help me?". Your specialist is thinking "I had 2 patients die yesterday on call, I have to get through 30 follow up appointments today, one of them is that woman who keeps coming to emerge in query thyroid storm, one of them is that guy whose blood sugar is through the roof and he keeps going into DKA and I am worried he will die this week, and one is that person with the hashimotos and the headaches whose family doc keeps sending them to me". From the endos standpoint you are the least sick person they will see that day and their therapeutic goals are not the same as yours. You want to be back to normal health, they want to do the best they can for you but primarily keep you alive.

 

Its not the endos fault, there is just so many hours in the day and so many patients to see. Same for the family doc. Giving them the benefit of the doubt they are probably doing the best they can for you considering they only know so much and have so many other patients to see. I never give medical advice over the internet, and given that you have a family doc, an endocrinologist, and a plastic surgeon who are all qualified physicians it would be presumptuous of me to think they haven't considered a prolactinoma, but given your headaches I would be remiss to tell you that if you start having vision changes (tunnel vision) that you need to see someone and let them know about that new symptom.

 

TLDR: If you want to help people you don't have to be a doctor. Most physicians want to do a good job and help you but their motives are not always 100% to "help people". There seems to be a communication breakdown about what your goals of health are and what can be done for you at the moment and you should discuss this at your next visit. 

 

Good Luck

[freewheeler]

Put your health first--nothing else really matters if you don't have this.

 

Unfortunately patients often have to advocate for themselves--no system is perfect.

 

At 17 you're likely at least 5 years out from seriously entertaining medical school.

 

Do what you need to do to take care of yourself and school-wise just focus on grades if ECs are a little too demanding at this point considering the condition of your health.

 

GPA >> MCAT > ECs

 

Trust me, you don't have to be special or spectacular in order to attend medical school in Canada.

[FreudianMarxist]

That really does put things into context...

[Birdy]

Thing is, when you've got challenges other people don't have, it sucks. I get it, believe me. But you've got two choices: you can either get on with it or give in. While I am certainly prone to periods of grumbling about the fact that some things are more difficult for me than they would be for most (that's what my blog is for), in the end most people have challenges of some sort. If you want to do it, do it. Don't give up before you've even tried just because it's not a level playing field. Nothing ever is.

 

Lots of people have gone on at length in threads all over this site about how it's important not to see medicine as the only thing you could do so I won't revisit that much, but I just want to point out that there is more to life. It's important to diversify your interests and make sure you're looking at medicine with a healthy perspective. 

 

All that said, I wish you luck with getting your condition under control. While it's certainly frustrating to be coping with uncontrolled symptoms particularly when you do not feel like you are getting what you need from your health care providers, learning to live as well as possible within your limitations while you work towards symptom control that is optimal for you is hard, but something that support groups and fellow patients can help with. 

 

 

Put your health first--nothing else really matters if you don't have this.

 

Unfortunately patients often have to advocate for themselves--no system is perfect.

 

 

Completely disagree with the bolded and I'd urge you to consider your platitudes more carefully.  I've heard people say things like this before in a sort of offhand way without realizing how very insensitive it can sound to someone dealing with chronic health issues. This poster will never not have to deal with this. He may be able to optimize his control and live quite well with hypothyroid, as very many patients do without major lifestyle impact, but it will never not be there. It's still always going to be part of his life. I've dealt with health issues my whole life and it's very frustrating to never feel completely 'normal,' even when well-managed. But my life is still fantastic, even when my symptoms are poorly controlled. Health is not a prerequisite to a meaningful life. 

[Hammmmmy]

I will bite because this is something that had been a central theme throughout med school for me.

 

1) We would all like to think that people get into medicine for noble reasons, and when we are interviewing everyone plays the part. "I want to advance (insert random cause here) and be a role model" "I want to be at the forefront of human science and technology" "I want to cure (insert random disease here) that affected my second cousin twice removed". The reality is much different. From my experience people get into medicine for a varying combination of the following reasons: 

 

1) Steady and secure job with great pay and portability

2) Respect from society

3) Respect from parents/girlfriend/boyfriend/best friend/high school guidance counselor who said you would never amount to anything

4) Parents are forcing me

5) I want a job where I think and don't get my hands dirty

6) I like gross things and I want to cut into people

7) I like power

8) I want to do something that has meaning/purpose

9) I want people to think I am smart

10) I want to help people*

 

* This is always the first thing that people say and it is always the first thing that goes by the wayside. Personally I think when people are forced to really examine this motive there isn't much depth to it. If you want to "help people" (and not you personally but people in general) why does it have to be medicine? Why not psychology, PT/OT, resp therapy, non-medical stuff like working for an NGO or social work. Everyone on this forum will say that this is their number one reason why they follow this path but I got to tell you when someone is on hour 22 of a 30 hour call shift and they are called to see a patient, or to make it a bit more relevant to you, when someone is in clinic and they are trying to get through 20-40 patients so they can pay the bills and keep the lights on, it is rarely the "desire to help people" that keeps them going. It is all the other things on the list, and most of the time it is all about the Benjamins. 

 

Now this is coming from someone who has just been on a month of night shifts in a major city's ER, and I fully admit I am a bit burnt and bitter, but this is a longstanding trend I have observed. 

 

Everyone comes into medical school thinking "I will be the one who is different, I am going to get through all this and stay true to my ideals and principles" yet I can only think of a handful of docs I have come across who I would safely say have maintained a noble perspective. Medschool and residency changes people and strips away the veneer of false motives. What comes out on the other side is usually not the ideal. Again this is not always the case.

 

I remember a resident I met on a rotation when I was a 1st year med student. I thought she was the best person I had ever come across. Did a masters, big on refugee health care, big on women's health. She was in 1st year of residency. Took time to teach, took time to talk to every patient and make sure they understood everything, called families at home. Advance 3 years and I am on rotation and she is a senior resident. Total 180. 3 years of being perpetually tired, abused by patients and preceptors, and never leaving the hospital broke her. She was like every other surgical senior resident: hard as nails with zero patience for anything or anyone. It is something I am watching play out again in real time as my friends advance through residency. I distinctly recall mourning the day a close friend matched to gen surge because I knew she would be a different person on the other side and I am sad to say I already hate how bitter and jaded she has become 2 years in.

 

I personally believe that everyone who gets into this wants to be good at it regardless of their motives. I think almost everyone wants to do the right thing in most situations. But I think that the system is broken and the weight of the world crushes most peoples idealism and the only thing that keeps them going is the more baser desires. The few who are the exceptions to the rule are truly remarkable people and if you ever come across one do all that you can to learn from them and keep them in your life. 

 

2) Now with respect to your condition.

 

Take your family doc for example. They have the shortest and easiest residencies. Family medicine usually attracts the more bubbly and idealistic students because it involves spending your day working with patients and their families. However, some pick family med because it is the easiest and most portable vocation. It is no secret that they don't get paid very well compared to other specialties, meaning if you want to make money you need to see as many patients as possible in a day. Most fee for service is set up on a 15 minute billing code. So they get paid X amount to see a patient for 15 minutes. If it is a complicated patient or there is something extra to be done they can charge extra (to the province) for things like a pap, or to remove stitches, etc. For most patients they can only charge the basic 15 minute rate. Working 8 hours a day means 32 patients if it works like clock work. To make any real money you need to see >40 patients in a day so some aren't getting their full 15 minutes. Others are going to take up more than their 15 and so that eats into the schedule too.

 

So you come to the office with a complicated complaint related to something that requires a specialist. Your family doctor has a very basic knowledge of how to treat complex endocrine disorders, that is why we have endocrinologists. How long does it take for you to tell them what is wrong? How long to examine? How long to chart? Now you have a problem that they don't know a lot about and have to try to look stuff up, how much can you learn about a complex endocrinopathy in 15 minutes? in 5 minutes? Not enough to treat someone effectively. Your family doc is saying to themselves "I don't know how to treat this person, they have a specialist who knows, why are they coming to see me about something I can't fix? The specialist will know how what to do. Are they dying? No, they can wait to see their specialist". 

 

Now you see your specialist, and this is the big disconnect between physicians and society. What you think is an emergency or urgent is not the same as what they do. You think "this is really affecting my life, I am suffering, I need help, why won't anyone help me?". Your specialist is thinking "I had 2 patients die yesterday on call, I have to get through 30 follow up appointments today, one of them is that woman who keeps coming to emerge in query thyroid storm, one of them is that guy whose blood sugar is through the roof and he keeps going into DKA and I am worried he will die this week, and one is that person with the hashimotos and the headaches whose family doc keeps sending them to me". From the endos standpoint you are the least sick person they will see that day and their therapeutic goals are not the same as yours. You want to be back to normal health, they want to do the best they can for you but primarily keep you alive.

 

Its not the endos fault, there is just so many hours in the day and so many patients to see. Same for the family doc. Giving them the benefit of the doubt they are probably doing the best they can for you considering they only know so much and have so many other patients to see. I never give medical advice over the internet, and given that you have a family doc, an endocrinologist, and a plastic surgeon who are all qualified physicians it would be presumptuous of me to think they haven't considered a prolactinoma, but given your headaches I would be remiss to tell you that if you start having vision changes (tunnel vision) that you need to see someone and let them know about that new symptom.

 

TLDR: If you want to help people you don't have to be a doctor. Most physicians want to do a good job and help you but their motives are not always 100% to "help people". There seems to be a communication breakdown about what your goals of health are and what can be done for you at the moment and you should discuss this at your next visit. 

 

Good Luck

 

I enjoyed this Ethnography-esque description of the medicine life. This may change in future years or may just be a very narrow perspective on medicine but I'd like you to know that it was very enlightening to me. 

[Leon]

I haven't been on premed for a while but it seems a lot of people in the medical field are quite active and the advice I'm seeing is quite strong. This is a lucky time for posters on this forum! I strongly agree with the other posts. There is indeed a disconnect between patients and physicians. I'm on my last week of clerkship, working in the emerg and many times patients complain to me about wait times etc. It's difficult to explain to someone waiting an hour for a sore throat that you are not as high on the priority list as the woman who just collapsed without vital signs, or the trauma that just came in by ems, or the difficult airway that pulled every single emerg doc from the department away to successfully intubate before she became hypoxic and got permanent brain damage. Part of being a physician is balancing patient's expectations against the immediate medical urgency of various patients. That said I do understand how difficult things must be for you. I hope you are able to see an endo soon who can address your needs more rapidly.

 

I am definitely fatigued at the end of my third year but I have mostly retained much of my ideals thus far. The behaviour of other physicians does not have to be a standard for you. I specifically decided to avoid certain specialties because I feel they would stamp the humanity out of me and I don't want to be a physician who has lost that.

 

Medicine is what you make of it. Some succumb quickly to the lifestyle. It can be very difficult in some specialties. Rounding at 6 every morning on surgery, operating all day and leaving at 7pm on a routine day isn't for everyone. And yet some people actually like that. I wouldn't be disheartened by what you see. Things are less ideal than what most expect when they first enter medical school but there are many people who persevered and remained kind and empathic people who continue to do their best for their patients. It's definitely difficult but possible. There is a video called this is water which I sometimes use to motivate myself and keep perspective. Good luck!

[rogerroger]

Maintaining work-life balance is critical to retaining your humanity. If all you do is grind away 12 hrs a day 7 days a week in a hospital and then study / take calls for all waking hours at home, you will become miserable. It will affect your interactions with patients and any other human you encounter. So the lip service paid to work-life balance is not just talk. It is the key to remaining sane, happy and delivering good care and one of the more challenging things to do while embracing this lifestyle.

 

I think many of the crusty doctors out there are crusty because they have failed to achieve this balance IMHO.

[canucks_14]

I will bite because this is something that had been a central theme throughout med school for me.

 

1) We would all like to think that people get into medicine for noble reasons, and when we are interviewing everyone plays the part. "I want to advance (insert random cause here) and be a role model" "I want to be at the forefront of human science and technology" "I want to cure (insert random disease here) that affected my second cousin twice removed". The reality is much different. From my experience people get into medicine for a varying combination of the following reasons: 

 

1) Steady and secure job with great pay and portability

2) Respect from society

3) Respect from parents/girlfriend/boyfriend/best friend/high school guidance counselor who said you would never amount to anything

4) Parents are forcing me

5) I want a job where I think and don't get my hands dirty

6) I like gross things and I want to cut into people

7) I like power

8) I want to do something that has meaning/purpose

9) I want people to think I am smart

10) I want to help people*

 

* This is always the first thing that people say and it is always the first thing that goes by the wayside. Personally I think when people are forced to really examine this motive there isn't much depth to it. If you want to "help people" (and not you personally but people in general) why does it have to be medicine? Why not psychology, PT/OT, resp therapy, non-medical stuff like working for an NGO or social work. Everyone on this forum will say that this is their number one reason why they follow this path but I got to tell you when someone is on hour 22 of a 30 hour call shift and they are called to see a patient, or to make it a bit more relevant to you, when someone is in clinic and they are trying to get through 20-40 patients so they can pay the bills and keep the lights on, it is rarely the "desire to help people" that keeps them going. It is all the other things on the list, and most of the time it is all about the Benjamins. 

 

Now this is coming from someone who has just been on a month of night shifts in a major city's ER, and I fully admit I am a bit burnt and bitter, but this is a longstanding trend I have observed. 

 

Everyone comes into medical school thinking "I will be the one who is different, I am going to get through all this and stay true to my ideals and principles" yet I can only think of a handful of docs I have come across who I would safely say have maintained a noble perspective. Medschool and residency changes people and strips away the veneer of false motives. What comes out on the other side is usually not the ideal. Again this is not always the case.

 

I remember a resident I met on a rotation when I was a 1st year med student. I thought she was the best person I had ever come across. Did a masters, big on refugee health care, big on women's health. She was in 1st year of residency. Took time to teach, took time to talk to every patient and make sure they understood everything, called families at home. Advance 3 years and I am on rotation and she is a senior resident. Total 180. 3 years of being perpetually tired, abused by patients and preceptors, and never leaving the hospital broke her. She was like every other surgical senior resident: hard as nails with zero patience for anything or anyone. It is something I am watching play out again in real time as my friends advance through residency. I distinctly recall mourning the day a close friend matched to gen surge because I knew she would be a different person on the other side and I am sad to say I already hate how bitter and jaded she has become 2 years in.

 

I personally believe that everyone who gets into this wants to be good at it regardless of their motives. I think almost everyone wants to do the right thing in most situations. But I think that the system is broken and the weight of the world crushes most peoples idealism and the only thing that keeps them going is the more baser desires. The few who are the exceptions to the rule are truly remarkable people and if you ever come across one do all that you can to learn from them and keep them in your life. 

 

2) Now with respect to your condition.

 

Take your family doc for example. They have the shortest and easiest residencies. Family medicine usually attracts the more bubbly and idealistic students because it involves spending your day working with patients and their families. However, some pick family med because it is the easiest and most portable vocation. It is no secret that they don't get paid very well compared to other specialties, meaning if you want to make money you need to see as many patients as possible in a day. Most fee for service is set up on a 15 minute billing code. So they get paid X amount to see a patient for 15 minutes. If it is a complicated patient or there is something extra to be done they can charge extra (to the province) for things like a pap, or to remove stitches, etc. For most patients they can only charge the basic 15 minute rate. Working 8 hours a day means 32 patients if it works like clock work. To make any real money you need to see >40 patients in a day so some aren't getting their full 15 minutes. Others are going to take up more than their 15 and so that eats into the schedule too.

 

So you come to the office with a complicated complaint related to something that requires a specialist. Your family doctor has a very basic knowledge of how to treat complex endocrine disorders, that is why we have endocrinologists. How long does it take for you to tell them what is wrong? How long to examine? How long to chart? Now you have a problem that they don't know a lot about and have to try to look stuff up, how much can you learn about a complex endocrinopathy in 15 minutes? in 5 minutes? Not enough to treat someone effectively. Your family doc is saying to themselves "I don't know how to treat this person, they have a specialist who knows, why are they coming to see me about something I can't fix? The specialist will know how what to do. Are they dying? No, they can wait to see their specialist". 

 

Now you see your specialist, and this is the big disconnect between physicians and society. What you think is an emergency or urgent is not the same as what they do. You think "this is really affecting my life, I am suffering, I need help, why won't anyone help me?". Your specialist is thinking "I had 2 patients die yesterday on call, I have to get through 30 follow up appointments today, one of them is that woman who keeps coming to emerge in query thyroid storm, one of them is that guy whose blood sugar is through the roof and he keeps going into DKA and I am worried he will die this week, and one is that person with the hashimotos and the headaches whose family doc keeps sending them to me". From the endos standpoint you are the least sick person they will see that day and their therapeutic goals are not the same as yours. You want to be back to normal health, they want to do the best they can for you but primarily keep you alive.

 

Its not the endos fault, there is just so many hours in the day and so many patients to see. Same for the family doc. Giving them the benefit of the doubt they are probably doing the best they can for you considering they only know so much and have so many other patients to see. I never give medical advice over the internet, and given that you have a family doc, an endocrinologist, and a plastic surgeon who are all qualified physicians it would be presumptuous of me to think they haven't considered a prolactinoma, but given your headaches I would be remiss to tell you that if you start having vision changes (tunnel vision) that you need to see someone and let them know about that new symptom.

 

TLDR: If you want to help people you don't have to be a doctor. Most physicians want to do a good job and help you but their motives are not always 100% to "help people". There seems to be a communication breakdown about what your goals of health are and what can be done for you at the moment and you should discuss this at your next visit. 

 

Good Luck

I have a question for you. Do you think that medicine is not meaningful work?

[carolynH]

@Fresh Fry, bravo for taking the time to write such long and true reply!  Your post is to the point! I've known some med students who make you wonder how did they fall through the cracks to get in?  But I still believe in the good in many other med students/residents in the system. Let's hope that they can retain their ideals and passion when they become attending physicians!

[Fresh fry]

I have a question for you. Do you think that medicine is not meaningful work?

 

I have waited a few days before answering this, mostly because I don't know where you got that from what I said, but also because I am not exactly sure what you are asking.

 

I don't want to read too much into what you have asked but at the same time the term "meaningful" is completely empty without context. I usually pride myself on not being a pedant but the term 'work" is also very inappropriate. I sincerely believe that medicine is not a "job" or something one does as an occupation. It is not "work". I won't be patronizing and say it is a "calling" or a "profession", and maybe I am being overly critical by harping on your choice of words without offering an apt alternative, but the term "work" implies a certain connotation to your question that makes it difficult to answer without long caveats and explanations.

 

Like most things in life, the way people chose to eek out a living falls on a spectrum. On one end are the people who "work" to live. They try and find the right combination of the most tolerable/pleasurable work environments with an adequate level of pay. Somewhere on the other end are people who are defined by what they do. The lines between work and play all but disappear. Some of these people even manage to make some decent coin while they are at it. In this context the term "work" doesn't make any sense and implies someone is on the other end of the spectrum.

 

My intention is not to berate you but to actually try to honestly answer your question. I think the best way I can put it is if you ask a farmer if they "work" on a farm; they will look at you sideways. Some people do in fact work on farms but they would not call themselves farmers any more than a farmer would say "I work on a farm". I see medicine the same way and without being able to come up with a sufficient term in my post-call brain the best comparison I could make would be to say that I am "in" medicine, or that I am a "surgical resident" because saying that I "work" in medicine doesn't make any sense when you spend almost your entire waking life (sometimes subconscious life) thinking and living medicine. 

 

Yes, some people absolutely approach this as a "job" and it was one of the motivating factors I identified for some people. I think that people who look at medicine as a paycheck are certifiable as many others have said much better than me. There are so many better ways to make money that don't swallow your entire life, and people who are not willing to dedicate their entire life to this don't make for very good doctors. That is not to say people can't have other interests, families and whatnot, but all of that stuff always has to take the backseat to do this effectively.

 

Now with that rant aside do I personally think medicine is a worthy and important profession? Yes. Do I derive meaning from what I do? Yes, but there is no universal definition of "meaningful" and I kind of eluded to that in my post. People derive meaning in all sorts of ways. Some people find meaning in feeling important, others in being powerful. Some find meaning in doing something challenging and knowing they succeeded where others failed. Some people find meaning in not displeasing their families, by making their parents proud (you would be amazed how common this is). Some people actually find meaning in thinking they help other people and this is what I think you are alluding to. Do I think that in medicine we actually help people? Do we actually do anything with purpose to society (maybe the closest thing to the zeitgeist definition of meaningful I can think of)? Yeah sure with many many caveats. Do I think this is the main reason people get into medicine and keep going when times get tough? Hellllll no. 

 

My personal opinion is that for most people at best this is a second tier motivating factor. The first one someone will say when asked but likely the 298th on the list of real reasons. This isn't just cynicism this is from being immersed in this for years and looking at the stats objectively. What are the most desired residencies? Optho, plastics, EM, anesthesia. Why? Highest paid, best lifestyle. You are still an MD, still get to tell stories at cocktail parties about how you "save lives" but breaking that down further most optho grads go into corrective surgery (lasik=$$$), and most plastics grads are doing boobs for cash. In this country there are only a handful of things an MD can bill for out of pocket and there is no wonder those specialties are oversubscribed. What kind of Drs does the country, our society, need? Fam docs. If half these people that I hear go on and on about wanting to "help" people were being true to their claimed motives there would be no shortage of GPs anywhere.

 

I could go one for days but I have to get a few hours of reading done before I go to "work" tomorrow at 6am. JK, I'm not offended and will try to give you the benefit of the doubt on that one.

 

Peace yall

[Arztin]

My personal opinion is that for most people at best this is a second tier motivating factor. The first one someone will say when asked but likely the 298th on the list of real reasons. This isn't just cynicism this is from being immersed in this for years and looking at the stats objectively. What are the most desired residencies? Optho, plastics, EM, anesthesia. Why? Highest paid, best lifestyle. You are still an MD, still get to tell stories at cocktail parties about how you "save lives" but breaking that down further most optho grads go into corrective surgery (lasik=$$$), and most plastics grads are doing boobs for cash. In this country there are only a handful of things an MD can bill for out of pocket and there is no wonder those specialties are oversubscribed. What kind of Drs does the country, our society, need? Fam docs. If half these people that I hear go on and on about wanting to "help" people were being true to their claimed motives there would be no shortage of GPs anywhere.

Sorry it's kind of random but I just wanted to share something. In my own experience, it's funny how as med students, we almost never talk about money among ourselves. Med-1s tend to be totally clueless when it comes to how hospitals function, and don't ever talk about money as if it was some sort of taboo. Clerks are in constant existential crisis, and don't talk so much about money. However, when talking to senior residents, very often they will tell us "oh go in this or that speciality because you get a lot of money and lifestyle is amazing". 

 

And yeah, about the helping people part: the vast majority of med students I know don't want to work in rural areas. I had a senior resident telling me last week that many of his classmates chose long residencies but they really don't like their current specialties. However, they still do it because they make good money, and when you're in your 30s, it's kind of hard to start over.

[Tullius]

 I specifically decided to avoid certain specialties because I feel they would stamp the humanity out of me and I don't want to be a physician who has lost that.

 

May I ask which ones?  And what aspect of these specialties did you think would stamp the humanity out of you?  (feel free to PM if you prefer)