Prep101 - Free Writing Sample Feedback **New Thread**

[RaymondPrep101]

It seems that the last thread topped out at 30 pages. I did not know about this limit and it seems that some of the essays that were posted for Prompt 20 were lost. Hopefully, those who submitted essays for Prompt 20 still have them and can re-post them. My apologies for the inconvenience, I did not know about the page limit for threads.

 

I just discovered that some of the essays for prompt 19 that I marked have also been lost in the last thread. Hopefully, people got to see their marked essays before the issue.

 

I have posted the prompt again and extended the deadline accordingly.

[RaymondPrep101]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

Describe a specific situation in which a student's academic success might depend more on intelligence than on hard work. Discuss what you think determines whether a student's academic success depends more on hard work or on intelligence.

 

Instructions

In 30 minutes, write an essay for the prompt and instructions above and post your essay in this thread.

 

Use the Notepad accessory on your computer so word processing functions are turned off.

 

Note: Do not read other essays replying to this prompt on the forum until after you have written and submitted your own essay.

 

Deadline

11:59pm Thursday, May 17.

 

Essays posted after the deadline will not be scored but a new Prompt will be posted on Friday, May 18.

[Enviro_4_Medschool]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence.

 

Describe a specific situation in which a student's academic success might depend more on intelligence than on hard work. Discuss what you think determines whether a student's academic success depends more on hard work or on intelligence.

 

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There is a saying, "ninety percent hard work, ten percent talent". This suggests that even if someone is intelligent they need to put in hours of work to master a subject. Moreover, this can be extrapolated to mean that academically successful people have obtained their proficiency through hours of hard work. These hard working individuals have thus been rewarded with obtaining a degree as proof of their success and proficiency. A PhD designation could be considered the penultimate of academic success as it is the highest ranked recognized degree. When someone tries to obtain their PhD, there are comprehensives that are required before a more vigorous approach to their research. These comprehensives are so that the committee can determine if the applicant has sufficient knowledge in order to successfully defend the PhD. Moreover, the comprehensives can cover any area of the field which means that the candidate needs to know a huge volume of work. Even if the candidate is extremely bright it still requires many hours to cover every nuance of their discipline in order to answer difficult or obscure questions. Only a motivation to succeed and put in the hours will allow a candidate to show they can be successful.

 

However, a PhD candidate has decided to undergo higher education. For most people there is mandatory school that they have to participate in at an early age (i.e. the kinder garden to Grade 12 system). In these years a board decides a standerdized curriculum and there may be students who do not necessarily have to work hard because they are intelligent enough to grasp the material without hard work. The intelligent students may excel and become the top students in their class and therefore be considered academically successful. Conversely, there are students that are below normal intelligence who struggle to pass their courses even if they worked extremely hard. To these students, the curriculum is too challenging or not within their area of expertise, such as with autistic children, and they cannot succeed in a standardized academic environment.

 

Whether hard work supplements intelligence depends on the stage of development a student is at. Early years usually have standardized curriculum that may not be suited towards the students level of intelligence. Later on as there is more choice a student may pick appropriate areas or areas that would challenge the intelligent student. Once that student has come to a stage where they are sufficiently challenged then more work is needed to master the subject and complete the components of a more vigorous curriculum. In the case of PhD candidates this requires completing a demanding comprehensive before approved start of research. Regardless, one thing that all academic institutions should strive for is to try and make the degrees or diplomas obtained reflect an educational experience where students feel they learned and worked hard for. The standardized curriculum of the early years is wonderful as a way of assessment but there could be some flexibility to accelerate kids who grasp areas quickly versus kids who may require extra time and attention. That way students can work hard and still feel accomplished and successful in their academic careers.

 

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Thanks for looking into what happened and marking!

[RaymondPrep101]

I have gone through the last thread where posts were being lost.

 

For prompt 19, the marked essays that were submitted by these users were lost:

Donna71

KatMatt

DaKirbster

xymex

Neuro_07

Sharpshooter

Medhopeful64

Blue181

 

Can these users please post here and let me know if they had an opportunity to look at their marked essay before the forum deleted them? I can remark them and post them here but I would prefer to not have to go through the trouble of marking them again.

 

Please let me know. Thanks

[donna71]

Hi Raymond, I got a chance to have a look at your comments thanks!

 

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence.

 

 

 

As students a great deal of time and energy is put into one's studies in order to achieve academic accomplishments. It can be said that a student's success is more dependent upon the input of hard work than on inherent intelligence. For instance, Harvey Cushing achieved great success and was a pioneer or founding father of neurosurgery. He was the first to document Cushing's syndrome, developed safer surgical protocols and instruments and increased the rate of survival for neurosurgical patients. He spent meticulous effort to save, preserve, and study hundreds of patient brains, the collection which remains at Yale University. His success was largely due to his hard work ethic; Cushing would spend more time with his work with patients than he did with family. He devoted so much of his time with patients that he neglected his family and failed to develop relationships with his children. In fact, he had even missed the birth of one of his children. Therefore Cushing's pioneering successes came as a result of long hours of dedicated hard work rather than of inherent intelligence.

 

On the other hand, not all academic success is a result of hard work, but may largely be a consequence of one's natural acuity or intelligence. Take for instance the famous Albert Einstein, who is largely a representation of intelligence. Einstein is known for his break through equation E=mc^2 in the world of physics and mathematics. Upon his death, Einstein's brain was preserved and analysed and it was found that certain regions of his brain deviated from that found in the norm. Regions of the brain involved in mathematical, visual, and spatial cognition were larger which may account for his ability to derive the famous equation. Therefore Einstein's contribution to the field of physics and mathematics may be largely due to an inherently acquired intelligence, rather than hard work, which was enabled through a brain specially structured for the type of work called for.

 

Academic achievements help contribute to the growing field of knowledge in all disciplines. Such success is a result of hard work but sometimes it is largely a result of a natural gift of intelligence. What determines whether academic success is a result of hard work or intelligence depends on whether the ideas or achievements result in the expansion of practical clinical knowledge or of abstract knowledge. If the achievements result in increased practical knowledge then such success is largely a result of dedicated hard work, as illustrated with Cushing's need to devote a great deal of time with the hospital and his patients. However if the achievements result in the expansion of abstract mathematical knowledge, the success is largely a result of an inherent intelligence as exemplified by Einstein's mathematical prowess and acuity, an advantage endowed by his brain structure . Regardless, the results derived from the dedication and natural gifts of today's students will result in a more knowledgeable future for all.

[medhopeful64]

I have gone through the last thread where posts were being lost.

 

For prompt 19, the marked essays that were submitted by these users were lost:

Donna71

KatMatt

DaKirbster

xymex

Neuro_07

Sharpshooter

Medhopeful64

Blue181

 

Can these users please post here and let me know if they had an opportunity to look at their marked essay before the forum deleted them? I can remark them and post them here but I would prefer to not have to go through the trouble of marking them again.

 

Please let me know. Thanks

 

Hey Raymond,

 

I got an opportunity to look at my marked essay before it was deleted. Thanks!

[KatMatt]

I have gone through the last thread where posts were being lost.

 

For prompt 19, the marked essays that were submitted by these users were lost:

Donna71

KatMatt

DaKirbster

xymex

Neuro_07

Sharpshooter

Medhopeful64

Blue181

 

Can these users please post here and let me know if they had an opportunity to look at their marked essay before the forum deleted them? I can remark them and post them here but I would prefer to not have to go through the trouble of marking them again.

 

Please let me know. Thanks

 

Hi Raymond,

 

I unfortunately did not see my mark before the forum deleated it.

[RaymondPrep101]

Prompt 19 KatMatt

 

Modern society is rife with examples of images as communication, with the mass media and television news relying heavily on images to communicate important events and issues. Good. While the media context has certainly hastened society's reliance on and expectation that images will tell stories, images have become central to our society primarily because they are such an effective communicative medium. News reel taken during the United States' war in Vietnam provide a heart-wrenching example of how images convey reality more accurately than words. Prior to this first "television war", ordinary Americans relied on second-hand stories alone to gain an understanding of what life inside a war zone is like. However, as images of bombs blanketing entire communities, mothers mourning for their lost children, and crippled American troops were broadcast or printed for ordinary Americans to see, the reality of war became clear to many people in a way that words and stories had never before allowed for. Indeed, many Americans were so outraged by the reality of the war, which they were seeing for the first time, that they became actively involved in protesting the US' involvement in Vietnam.

Excellent.

 

Despite the allure and ability of images to evoke an emotional response, they are not always the most effective way of communicating a message or situation. Careful. The prompt is focused on conveying reality not emotional response or communicating messages. Indeed, carefully crafted poetry or prose are sometimes more effective than images in terms of communicating the reality of a time, place, or issue. English poetry written during the industrial revolution provides a poignant example of how language and/or literature can be used to create an enduring understanding of a bygone time and culture. Poets such as Wordsworth wrote of the conflict people of the time felt between the pastoral and the industrial lifestyles; as the conflict was internal, it could not have been captured or communicated as effectively with images.

This example could work. However, the discussion is too sparse and requires more elaboration/expansion.

Whether or not visual images convey reality more accurately than words do depends largely on what aspect of a reality one is trying to communicate: the impersonal/external/general, or the personal/internal/specific. Issues: 1) This is convoluted which is not what you want. You want your resolution principle to be simple and clean. 2) These are mostly vague terms. Photographs or video of war, for example, go a long way in communicating the general reality and horrors of a conflict. However, while photographs and video may show highly personal moments of those involved in the conflict, they also provide an impersonal account of the conflict, in that images are most often captured by those uninvolved in the conflict itself, such as a journalist. In contrast, written first-person accounts of life during a conflict, such as the Diary of Anne Frank This is a new example. In the resolution paragraph you want to apply your resolution principle to the previously discussed example., provide an enduring record of one person's experience during a particular time or place. Indeed, while both images and words are effective media to convey reality, images provide more generalized and impersonal accounts, whereas words can offer insight into the personal, and specific. This does not address the writing task which is concerned with when one is better than the other.

The resolution here is not clear and convincing.

 

Overall Mark: 3.5/6 (Corresponds to approximately an O )

Breakdown (out of 6):

Addresses tasks: 3.5 Supporting task is completely addressed. Refuting task is somewhat addressed. Resolution task is weakly addressed.

Depth: 3.5

Focus and coherence: 3.5

Grammar and vocabulary: 4.5

[in2bat0r]

It takes more than simply knowing the answers to become successful in academia. A student’s level of academic accomplishment is determined primarily by the effort that he or she is willing to contribute to the overall struggle that is academic development, moreso than that individual’s intelligence endowment from birth. To find success in post-secondary education one must first finance said education. In today’s struggling economy, this can be quite a challenge for those less fortunate. While one may or may not be an intellectual genius, their talent will never be exposed to the world of academia for further development if they cannot afford to enter the institution. Hard work is required by the individual to finance a post secondary education in today’s economy, this work ethic is no doubt useful for tackling an immense and difficult courseload as well. Take for example, Dr. Ben Carson, a now renowned African American neurosurgeon who grew up in a single parent family, impoverished from the streets of Detroit. From a very young age his mother instilled in him a hard working nature, something that has undoubtably had a great impact on his life and academic ambitions. While few would question Dr. Carsons natural intellectual ability, his struggle from poverty to academic greatness most certainly had more to do with his hard working nature than his intelligence level.

 

On the other hand, a student’s academic success might in some cases depend on intelligence, moreso than hard work. For example, Stephen Hawking is arguably one of the greatest minds of our time, and a leader in the field of theoretical physics. In contrast from Dr. Carson, Stephen Hawking came from a much wealthier background, and also an inheritently academic background, as his father was a well-known biologist in the United Kingdom. Stephen Hawking did not have to overcome the same social and ecomonic barriers, as did Dr. Carson; Instead, his rare intellectual brilliance brought him great academic success.

 

The social and economic background of a given student determines whether or not their success in academics will be achieved mainly through a hard working nature, or through natural intelligence. It is likely that when faced with inherent discrimination and poverty, a student will have to work hard both in and out of school to achieve success in academics. In contrast, if a student is from a wealthier family, and is not generally facing any sort of social discrimation, then it is likely that their academic success will be achieved more through natural intelligence.

 

Thanks Raymond, I'm relatively new at this, your feedback is appreciated!

[KatMatt]

Prompt 19 KatMatt

 

Modern society is rife with examples of images as communication, with the mass media and television news relying heavily on images to communicate important events and issues. Good. While the media context has certainly hastened society's reliance on and expectation that images will tell stories, images have become central to our society primarily because they are such an effective communicative medium. News reel taken during the United States' war in Vietnam provide a heart-wrenching example of how images convey reality more accurately than words. Prior to this first "television war", ordinary Americans relied on second-hand stories alone to gain an understanding of what life inside a war zone is like. However, as images of bombs blanketing entire communities, mothers mourning for their lost children, and crippled American troops were broadcast or printed for ordinary Americans to see, the reality of war became clear to many people in a way that words and stories had never before allowed for. Indeed, many Americans were so outraged by the reality of the war, which they were seeing for the first time, that they became actively involved in protesting the US' involvement in Vietnam.

Excellent.

 

Despite the allure and ability of images to evoke an emotional response, they are not always the most effective way of communicating a message or situation. Careful. The prompt is focused on conveying reality not emotional response or communicating messages. Indeed, carefully crafted poetry or prose are sometimes more effective than images in terms of communicating the reality of a time, place, or issue. English poetry written during the industrial revolution provides a poignant example of how language and/or literature can be used to create an enduring understanding of a bygone time and culture. Poets such as Wordsworth wrote of the conflict people of the time felt between the pastoral and the industrial lifestyles; as the conflict was internal, it could not have been captured or communicated as effectively with images.

This example could work. However, the discussion is too sparse and requires more elaboration/expansion.

Whether or not visual images convey reality more accurately than words do depends largely on what aspect of a reality one is trying to communicate: the impersonal/external/general, or the personal/internal/specific. Issues: 1) This is convoluted which is not what you want. You want your resolution principle to be simple and clean. 2) These are mostly vague terms. Photographs or video of war, for example, go a long way in communicating the general reality and horrors of a conflict. However, while photographs and video may show highly personal moments of those involved in the conflict, they also provide an impersonal account of the conflict, in that images are most often captured by those uninvolved in the conflict itself, such as a journalist. In contrast, written first-person accounts of life during a conflict, such as the Diary of Anne Frank This is a new example. In the resolution paragraph you want to apply your resolution principle to the previously discussed example., provide an enduring record of one person's experience during a particular time or place. Indeed, while both images and words are effective media to convey reality, images provide more generalized and impersonal accounts, whereas words can offer insight into the personal, and specific. This does not address the writing task which is concerned with when one is better than the other.

The resolution here is not clear and convincing.

 

Overall Mark: 3.5/6 (Corresponds to approximately an O )

Breakdown (out of 6):

Addresses tasks: 3.5 Supporting task is completely addressed. Refuting task is somewhat addressed. Resolution task is weakly addressed.

Depth: 3.5

Focus and coherence: 3.5

Grammar and vocabulary: 4.5

 

Thank you so much for re-posting. This is very helpful. Cheers!

[spring]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence.

 

A student’s academic success can depend on a number of factors including hard work and intelligence. Hard work refers to being persistent, organized, disciplined and motivated to learn; whereas, intelligence refers to one’s inner talents and abilities in specific subject areas. Academic success can be defined in many different ways and there tends to be an individual difference in its definition. For instance, for a given student, academic success may mean passing all coursework whereas, for another student, academic success may mean achieving A grades in all coursework. Given either of the two definitions, many argue that in order for a student to achieve such success, he/she will need to work hard despite of their level of intelligence. This is especially true in subject areas that tend to be more theoretical such as science and math. A student needs to work hard, understand the material well and practice applying their knowledge to solve practical problems in order to achieve their desired level of success. Theoretical subjects require students to be well disciplined and motivated to learn. It is essential for students with interests in such subjects to work hard in order to understand the theoretical concepts as well as spend appropriate amount of time in practicing the application of their knowledge.

 

However, it is not always necessary for a student’s academic success to depend on hard work, rather it can be a result of his/her intelligence. For example, abstract subject areas such visual arts, theatre, dance and other forms of fine arts requires one to be intelligent (i.e. talented) in their fields of interest. A student’s academic success in such subject areas depends more on intelligence and talent than on hard work. It is true that a student pursuing further learning in such abstract subjects needs to practice and work hard; however, they must first possess the intelligence and talent for them to be able to make a statement to their audience.

 

In summary, a student’s academic success can depend on a number of factors. For more theoretical subjects such as science and math, success can be mainly driven by hard work whereas, for abstract subjects such as the fine arts, success can be mainly driven by intelligence and talent. Moreover, it is also important for us to note that the other component for success is also important: students studying abstract subject areas still need to work hard in addition to their intelligence in order to improve and stand out from the competition. Similarly, students pursuing further learning in theoretical subjects also need to have a certain level of intelligence in addition to their hard work to allow for a better understanding of the presented materials. As such, the two components for academic success, namely hard work and intelligence are essential at all time but one component can play a more important role than the other depending on the subject area being studied.

[chris67]

The quality of a student is most often measured by his or her academic success. Students who achieve good grades are considered to be academically successful, and this is largely due to the high amount of effort they put into their school work. Students who increase the amount of time spent studying will often see an increase in their grades, and will similarly see a drop in their marks if they do not study as much. My first year class at the University of Guelph in Canada, received a motivational speech from Professor William Tam, who is one of the most frequently cited indiivduals in his field of organic chemistry. He told us that he has taken several IQ and other tests designed to measure innate or natural intelligence and received average scores, but was able to do extremely well in all of his undergraduate courses. He said that his academic success did not come from a natural intelligence, but from all of the effort that he put into his school work.

 

Despite the correlation between high grades and hard work, a person's academic success may be influenced by an innate proficiency in certain subjects, which can be referred to as intelligence. A study done in 2011 at the University of Cambridge in England found distinct differences between cognitive abilities in elementary school children. They postulated that these differences may cause proficiency or deficiency in subjects based on mathematics. These findings indicate that a person may be naturally predisposed to succeed in a certain subject, or do poorly in another.

 

Ultimately, what decides a person's academic success is often the subject being tested. A person may be able to achieve high grades in science based subjects such as chemistry, where success is very dependant on memorization. Memorization requires plenty of effort and hard work, and can therefore be done by anybody. However, in subjects like mathematics a person may be genetically predisposed to do better or worse than average, simply due to the highly cognitive nature of the subject.

 

 

 

Thanks a lot!

[medoc]

Hi Raymond,

I wanted to thank you for helping me with the essays I wrote prior to writing my MCAT. I received a score of "P" on my real exam. Thanks once again for all the help.

[waldosa]

Thank you for this!

Prompt 20

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Success in academia results from a mixture of the natural intellectual ability of a student and the diligence with which those talents are applied. The quality of someone's efforts can be effectively gauged through their intelligence, whereas the quantity of hours that they put in reflects their hard work. The two are not easily separated, and as such, determining which one is more important than the other depends on specific circumstances. Hard work is rewarded in tasks that are repetitive and of a lower order intellectually. Tasks that involve skills that can be learned over multiple attempts benefit greatly from hard work. Some examples of such tasks are basic math problems and drawings - both involve skill sets that are built up easily through practice and natural ineptitude for either task can easily be compensated for through persistence and practice.

 

Higher order tasks are those that engage our higher capabilities. For example, the analysis of art involves not only meticulous research on the life of the artist who produced it, but also an understanding of the era in which the art was produced. An integration of the two with an intuitive understanding of human nature is crucial to getting inside the mind of an artist and intelligently evaluating a work of art. Similarly, the study of advanced mathematics, such as topology and Riemannian geometry requires that the learner be able to spatially visualize concepts that are highly abstract and non-intuitive to the general public. The ability to spatially reason, or to understand the mind of another human in a specific context, are tasks that engage our higher intellectual capabilities. These are not tasks that can be improved through diligent practice or hours of hard work. These abilities seem to reflect natural, in-born capabilities of humans. Hard work and persistence can only ensure a basic appreciation of such concepts and natural intelligence is needed to thoroughly comprehend such big ideas and conquer such tasks.

 

The nature of the task, and the level of mastery one wishes to gain over a task, are both determinants of whether or not hard work is more important than intelligence at obtaining academic success. Some tasks, like basic mathematics, are easily improved through a great deal of practice, and natural talent is not required to succeed at such tasks. Advancing the study of mathematics to deeper realms and greater experiences involves a greater mastery over the subject material, and requires not only diligence, but a natural aptitude for the subject matter. One needs to be able to spatially reason to succeed at understanding advanced concepts in topology, for example. Hard work will not better intelligence in such respects, and academic success in the form of grades will testify to that. Someone who works less, but is nevertheless more intelligent, is more likely to succeed in tasks such as these, which engage our higher capabilities.

[DaKirbster]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

Describe a specific situation in which a student's academic success might depend more on intelligence than on hard work. Discuss what you think determines whether a student's academic success depends more on hard work or on intelligence.

 

 

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All good students strive to do well in their courses. Some students are able to be academically successful with minimal work because of their natural intelligence, whereas other students put in lots of hard work to succeed. Often, it is the student's hard work that leads to their academic success rather than their intelligence. This is the case for many subjects that require a lot of rote memorization and background knowledge to do well. For example, a biochemistry course will require its students to memorize many complicated metabolic pathways, with many steps involving many enzymes and reactants. The student will need work hard in order and put in many hours to remember these complex pathways. The student's natural intelligence, although it might help slightly with memorization, will have a lesser impact on the student's success than their hard work as the pathways simply need to be memorized and are rarely intuitive. Even a very intelligent student will need lots of hard work in order to do well.

 

However, there are some cases whereby a student's academic success depends more on their intelligence than their hard work. This is often the case when the subject at hand requires a deeper and more holistic understanding of and intuition for the material being studied in order to succeed. For example, an advanced mathematics course will teach its students some theorems that they will need to understand and be able to apply to problems. A student who works very hard but has no intuition for the subject will not be able to succeed. They can look at and try to memorize the theorems for hours, but without sufficient intelligence on the subject they will not go far as they need to really understand the material. An intelligent student can understand the material and be able to apply it to problems; some highly mathematically-intuitive academics are required to work very little to succeed as they easily understand the material without it.

 

What determines whether a student's academic success depends more on hard work or on intelligence is if the subject being learned is memorization-based or concept-based. A subject that requires abundant rote memorization, such as biochemistry, will require the student to work hard on the material in order to achieve academically. A subject that is more concept-based, such as mathematics, makes the student rely more on their intelligence as their hard work will only get them so far without a whole understanding of the material. Ultimately, all subjects will require varying degrees of intelligence and work ethic for success, and the students must adapt to meet its requirements. However, if a student wishes to succeed academically to a high level in all subjects, they will be required to work hard and be highly intelligent.

 

 

 

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Thanks Raymond, and I did see my scored prompt 19 so you don't need to remark it!

[souljaboy]

Academic success is a direct reflection of the student's studies, which can be significantly affected by the amount of work a student has put into the subject. Hard work is absolutely integral to being successful when facing topics that require continuous practice and memorization. When facing a field such as anatomy and human physiology, the only way to succeed is to memorize all the facts and concepts. With hard work, the information will eventually be imprinted in a student's mind. The amount of work the student has put into learning the facts and concepts will directly reflect upon his academic success because knowing the information is the only way to be successful in a field such as anatomy. No matter how intelligent a student is, he will always need to put the work in because there is no other way to attain the answer unless you have dedicated your time to learning the information. A less intelligent person that has put in much more work will be able to achieve more than an intelligent person who puts in a minimal amount of work because that effort provided him with more knowledge which can only be obtained by spending more time.

 

Although hard work is important, intelligence can be the absolute deciding factor in certain fields where hard work cannot achieve the same result that natural intelligence will provide. Many of the most successful students in engineering and mathematics have intelligence and an aptitude for math that hard work cannot replicate. In these fields, if you do not possess the intelligence required, it is very difficult to achieve success no matter how much work is put in. Personally I am not very affluent in mathematics and when taking a difficult calculus class, no matter how much work I spent with practice questions some of the concepts remained foreign to me, whereas another student who can go through the problems with ease without even exerting much effort. Even with hard work, some of the results are just not attainable if you do not have adequate intelligence.

 

In the overall scheme, a student who is hard working but not intelligent will never be able to reach what an intelligent student can achieve simply because there is a limit to what you can achieve with hard work. No matter how much a horse born with short legs works, he will never be able to achieve what a thoroughbred can do on the racetrack. Much is the same regarding intelligence because those with it have a natural advantage that no amount of hardwork can attain. A hardworking student with limited intelligence will be able to match or perhaps exceed a intelligent student who does not study much in some fields, while in others they will never be able to match the intelligent student's achievements.

[perspectives]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

Academic success stems from a student's intelligence and willingness to put in the effort to learn. However, a natural aptitude for understanding the curriculum will be meaningless without hard work put into reviewing the material. In any students' academic career, at least some effort needs to be made in order to be put into a situation where their intelligence could shine through. For instance, a history student may be highly intelligent. Yet, without putting in work to read the textbook, listen attentively in class, and to take effective notes, intelligence alone will not be able to lead to academic success. The exam will be testing the student on how much knowledge they have been able to memorize, and any amount of intelligence will not make up for a lack of hard work in this case.

 

However, there are specific cases of academic success where hard work does not trump intelligence. There are certain subject matters where an infinite quantity of time put into studying will still result in oblivion. An example of this is in the study of mathematics. Even if a student completes countless practice problems prior to an exam, this regurgitation will not be beneficial unless the student has the intelligence to comprehend the theory and ideology behind each question. The intelligence required in mathematics in order to understand and apply a theory to varying scenarios will be a much stronger dictator of how successful a student will be.

 

Therefore, the statement that academic success depends more greatly on whether a student is hardworking than intelligent is not always true. There are situations where hard work is the key determinant of academic success and there are situation where intelligence is. What determines whether hard work or intelligence is a bigger factor in dictating academic success is the field of study. When studying a topic that is not very conceptual and more heavily based on memorization, and knowledge previously known, then academic success will depend more on hard work. Examples of such fields of education include the previously mentioned history, where the key is in memorizing details from specific events in the past, or biology, where memorization of specific biological processes will lead to a good mark. In a field where the work is highly conceptual and theoretical, then intelligence will dictate how successful a student is. Although hard work is still required, in order to be successful in such a field, it requires more than just hard work. An intelligence and natural aptitude for the material is required. Such fields of education include physics, and mathematics, where models of reality are created to explain how things work. However, students will only be successful in this field mainly because of their intelligence and ability to see how reality works.

It is evident that different fields of education contrast in content, but as shown here, they also contrast in what is necessary to be successful in each respective field.

 

Thanks a lot for your help!

[blue181]

Thank you very much for your help Raymond! I did get to see the grade for my previous essay before it was deleted

 

Prompt #20

 

Academic success is something that most students strive to achieve. It usually takes a lot of hard work, but some people with very high intelligence levels are able to bypass that need. The academic success attained by Amy Chua's daughters is an example of success attained through hard work. Amy Chua is a Chinese mother who was given the nickname “Tiger Mom” because she was extremely strict when it came to her daughters’ academic success. She did not allow them to attend sleepovers, have friends over, watch television, or play computer games. Instead, all their time was dedicated to studying and doing homework to ensure that their grades never fell below an A. All this hard work paid off because her eldest daughter Sophia was accepted to both Harvard and Yale University. They are both extremely prestigious schools, and acceptance to either one is proof of a student’s academic success. So in this case, Sophia’s success depended on the hours of hard work that was enforced upon her by her mother.

 

However, sometimes hard work cannot explain academic success and achievement. For example, toddler Elise Tan-Roberts was one of the youngest people to join MERSA, a society for geniuses with an IQ of 140 or above. At just 2 years old, Elise was able to name the capital cities of multiple countries, as well as count to 10 in several languages. Her remarkable achievements were due to the fact that she was born with a high intelligence level. Other 2 year olds of average intelligence would have had to work extremely hard to learn what Elise learned. Even with hard work it may not be possible, as that kind of knowledge beyond what most 2 year olds are able to understand. However, Elise’s high IQ level allowed her to naturally pick up the knowledge with ease. So in Elise’s case, her academic success depended on her high intelligence level more so than hard work.

 

Overall, whether a student’s success is due to hard work or intelligence depends quite a lot on their natural intelligence level, or IQ. Someone with an average IQ would have to work hard in order to attain academic success. Take the “Tiger Mom’s” daughter Sophia for example. Although she is not a documented genius, she was able to get accepted to two of the most prestigious academic institutions in the world, but it took a lot of hard work and determination. However, for someone who is born a genius with a very high IQ, learning comes much easier to them, and they do not have to work as hard to attain academic success. 2 year old Elise Tan-Roberts is the perfect example of such natural talent. She was able to learn information far beyond her years without hard work because she was born with a very high IQ.

[Dasypus]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

Describe a specific situation in which a student's academic success might depend more on intelligence than on hard work. Discuss what you think determines whether a student's academic success depends more on hard work or on intelligence.

 

One might suggest that a student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence. Certainly many a parent has appealed to such a principle, trying to get their children to study. In many cases, they are right. An elementary-school-aged child of any modicum of intelligence can perform well in school provided that she works hard, studying the 7-times-table and the spelling list of the week. No brilliance of intellect will let a child coast through the building of academic foundations. They must be laid brick by brick.

 

On the other hand, this line falls apart later in academic life. Consider mathematics again. While it is hard work that allows a student to build up the foundations of mathematic knowledge, nothing but brilliance will allow success at the PhD level. For the mathematics dissertation, one needs only a few pages of work, but it must have an element of the new, something never before proven. Stepping out into the unknown in this way, drawing new inferences that the generations of previous scholars, all of whom had the same solid background and toolkit of techniques, failed to draw, requires some flash of inspiration in addition to all of the previous perspiration. Considering that every PhD student has put in some large amount of hard work to get there, it is nonetheless not necessarily the hardest-working that does the best, but more often the one with the 'mathematical mind', a certain sort of very focussed intelligence. Mathematics is not alone in this regard. In every field, to get to that very highest level of academic success requires a particular kind of intelligence, an intellectual 'knack' that cannot be substituted.

 

Hard work and intelligence are both necessary for any academic success. Success is impossible both for the student who is brilliant but never tries at all, and for the student who tries hard but is genuinely incapable of the mental task at hand. Most situations, and most students, fall between these extremes. What then distinguishes which is more important for academic success? For most schooling up to the high school level, hard work is the more important, because the expectations are set so that intelligence is not the limiting factor. What children are expected to learn are those things that, while it may take them a long time to get it right, they can all learn eventually. However, at a university or post-graduate level, the particular intellectual skill needed may be the limiting factor in a student's academic success, as the academic expectations become more specialized and technical. Some people simple do not have a 'mathematical mind', or a facility for language, or whatever particular intelligence is particular to the academic endeavor, and no amount of work will get them over that hurdle. Thus, it seems that parents are right that hard work is what children need to succeed in school, but that is true only for the basics; sadly, at the very top levels, intelligence counts more.

 

Thanks so much Raymond!

[Neuro_07]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

 

The famous physicist, Albert Einstein, said that, “A genius is 1% talent and 99% hard work.” Intelligence or talent is an individual’s natural aptitude for excelling. However, a student cannot be assured of academic success on the basis of intelligence. In current education system, academic success is more dependent on student’s efforts than intelligence. Schools do not design their exams to distinguish more intelligent students from less intelligent ones. The questions that appear on exams are formed on the basis of the material that is presented in the course books or the lectures. Hence, no matter how intelligent a student may be, if he/she has not read the material from the books, then it is impossible to attain a good grade. In fact, in this case, a student who has reviewed the material several times and, thus, prepared for the test properly, can outperform a more intelligent student who has not reviewed the material as many times. Therefore, given the nature of the exams at schools and universities, a student’s hard work is more important than intelligence in determining academic success.

 

However, there are certain kinds of tests that test a student’s intelligence, rather than the previously acquired knowledge on the subject matter. The verbal reasoning section of the Medical College Admission Test (MCAT) is more intelligence-based. The questions are based on passages on topics that student may not have read before and the answers require understanding of the passage in first reading, rather than memorization. Although, a student’s hard work may improve score on this section, but it may not guarantee a better score than a more intelligent student. The test’s requirement to comprehend and analyse at speed, allows distinction of more intelligent students from others. Hence, intelligence can be a determinant of success on some sections of standardized tests.

 

Whether the academic success is determined by hard work or intelligence depends on whether the test requires knowledge of previously learned material or spontaneous understanding of novel material. Tests designed by schools and universities are based on material from the books that are available to students prior to the examination. Thus, students can prepare for the test and, consequently, harder they work the better the chances of acquiring a better grade. On the other hand, a reading comprehension test requires understanding and analysis of novel subject matter during the test time. A student cannot prepare for such test and thus, has to rely on intelligence to achieve a good score. In conclusion, although both, intelligence and hard work, are important for a student’s academic success, when one is more important than the other depends on the nature of the test.

 

 

Thanks in advance. I hope this one is better than the last one.

[Que]

A student's academic success depends more on hard work than on intelligence

 

There exists a notion that hard work trumps intrinsic intelligence in the field of academia. Working dilligently with conviction and perseverence is judged to be the road to success, which can be more specifically labelled as academic achievements for students attending or affiliated with an institution.A superior innate understanding of materials or cognitive abilities does not guarantee achieving excellence in school. The fundamental principles or concepts in any field of scholarship require time and commitment to peruse and absorb. Intelligence alone does not allow one to obtain information, it only enables its synthesis and manipulation. Thus, in the rudimentary state of learning, a student's success depends largely on his or her diligence and commitment to learning. This is especially true prior to post-secondary education where the majority of success is defined by letter grades, which are themselves based on tests designed to extract rote memorization.These types of evaluations, for the most part, do not assess one's intelligence as much as they assess one's willingness to learn the information through hard work. As such, prior to university, a student's sucess depends on their academic discipline.

 

On the other hand, beyond the elementary basis of learning, scholarship excellency require ingenuity more than diligence. In university and beyond, many concepts are not simply presented in the form of regurgitation but require higher level of processing and novel synthesis. In order to achieve success, a student often must develop their own interpretation of the information and present their own understanding. Moreover, in graduate studies, academic success is not only defined by grades but also by novel discoveries. This creativity cannot be obtained solely from hard work but require one's intrinsic propensity to the material. As such, in university and beyond, a student's academic success relies more on intelligence than hard work.

 

Whether a student's academic success is more contingent on hard work or intelligence ultimately depends on the level of processing required for the information. Prior to university, many students do not require high levels of processing and can obtain high grades with simple rote memorization and regurgitation. In this situation, academic success can be realized with one's hard work, and indeed, simply relying on one's intelligence may fall short. However, beyond memorization, intelligence is required to not only process information but also come up with new ideas, relationships, and applications. This higher level of cognitive processing is required at university and beyond, where a student's success is not only measured by letter grades but also by their contribution to society at large.

[Que]

I have gone through the last thread where posts were being lost.

 

For prompt 19, the marked essays that were submitted by these users were lost:

Donna71

KatMatt

DaKirbster

xymex

Neuro_07

Sharpshooter

Medhopeful64

Blue181

 

Can these users please post here and let me know if they had an opportunity to look at their marked essay before the forum deleted them? I can remark them and post them here but I would prefer to not have to go through the trouble of marking them again.

 

Please let me know. Thanks

 

I have seen mine. Thank you

[RaymondPrep101]

Prompt 19 sharpshooter

 

It has been said many times that a picture is worth a thousand words. Pictures often illustrate reality more accurately than words do. Charities that want to help children suffering from poverty often have commercials on television to encourage individuals to donate to their charities. These charities usually show children suffering from poverty to illustrate the reality of what these children are suffering from. For example, I have seen commercials stating that many children suffer from starvation, while they show an image of children excessively underweight to the extent that you could see the ribs very clearly and they no longer appear like normal human beings. If the charities were to just write out what impoverished children suffer from, people who read the article would be not able understand the reality of their situation as accurately than they would from visual images of what they suffer from; they cannot see the true effects of what they suffer from just words. That is, individuals cannot see the effects (the reality) of starvation and malnutrition that these children suffer from by reading a description of these problems. Therefore, visual images illustrate reality more precisely than words do.

Excellent.

 

However, sometimes words convey reality more accurately than pictures do. For example, if one wanted to convey to others the reality of the difficulty of the Medical College Admission Test (MCAT), showing individuals pictures of the all preparatory books or a group of test takers would not illustrate the reality of the test more accurately than letting one read through some sample questions from each section of the test. If individuals were to just look at the pictures of the books, they cannot judge the difficulty of the questions; they could guess that the questions will be like their university exams in which they just have to memorize some facts and then recognize the correct answer in one of the multiple choices. However, in reality, successful test takers actually have to understand the concepts and apply them to novel situations; that is, just memorizing all the concepts on the MCAT will not ensure succes on the MCAT. Letting people read some sample MCAT questions, nonetheless, will convey to individuals the reality of the test; it will illustrate to them that it is more of a thinking test than a memory test similar to university exams.

This example is okay and you do get points for creativity. However, it is not entirely convincing because I don't think that anyone would ever use a picture of books to convey how difficult the MCAT is. Also a higher level example would have more depth.

 

Thus, pictures convey reality more accurately than words do when the visual images readily illustrate to individuals about the reality. This is vague and doesn't really say anything useful. For example, the pictures of children suffering from poverty readily convey the effects of starvation and malnutrition; these pictures illustrate the reality of their suffering more accurately than words do. This is the same idea as earlier. You do not get at why in this case, pictures are more effective than words. However, pictures of preparatory books or people taking a test, such as the MCAT, do no readily illustrate the reality of the difficulty of the test. Again, this is a little far fetched. Sample questions, which uses words instead of visual images, would more accurately convey the reality of the test.

Overall, the resolution paragraph is the weakest part of your essay. Your resolution paragraph does not address the writing task: Discuss what you think determines whether or not visual images convey reality more accurately than words do.

 

Overall Mark: 3.5/6 (Corresponds to approximately an O )

Breakdown (out of 6):

Addresses tasks: 3.5 Supporting task is completely addressed. Refuting task is adequately addressed. Resolution task is not addressed.

Depth: 4

Focus and coherence: 3

Grammar and vocabulary: 4.5

[RaymondPrep101]

The role of a political opposition is to criticize the policies of those in power.

Describe a specific situation in which the role of a political opposition might be something other than to criticize the policies of those in power. Discuss what you think determines when the role of a political opposition should be to criticize the policies of those in power and when it should not.

 

Instructions

In 30 minutes, write an essay for the prompt and instructions above and post your essay in this thread.

 

Use the Notepad accessory on your computer so word processing functions are turned off.

 

Note: Do not read other essays replying to this prompt on the forum until after you have written and submitted your own essay.

 

Deadline

11:59pm Tuesday, May 22.

 

Essays posted after the deadline will not be scored but a new Prompt will be posted on Wednesday, May 23.

[RaymondPrep101]

Prompt 20 Enviro_4_Medschool

 

There is a saying, "ninety percent hard work, ten percent talent". This suggests that even if someone is intelligent they need to put in hours of work to master a subject. Moreover, this can be extrapolated to mean that academically successful people have obtained their proficiency through hours of hard work. These hard working individuals have thus been rewarded with obtaining a degree as proof of their success and proficiency. This is unrelated to the writing task. A PhD designation could be considered the penultimate of academic grammar success as it is the highest ranked word choice recognized degree. When someone tries to obtain their PhD, there are comprehensives that are required before a more vigorous approach to their research ??. These comprehensives are so that the committee can determine if the applicant has sufficient knowledge in order to successfully defend the PhD. Moreover, the comprehensives can cover any area of the field which means that the candidate needs to know a huge volume of work. Even if the candidate is extremely bright it still requires many hours to cover every nuance of their discipline in order to answer difficult or obscure questions. Only a motivation to succeed and put in the hours will allow a candidate to show they can be successful.

This example is okay. However, you need to take out some of the filler and have more points that add substance. Although this paragraph is of sufficient length, not enough is said in the space. This example is pretty general and could use more depth and complexity. You also do not make a convincing argument that a PhD requires more hard work than intelligence. You establish that it does require hard work but don't address the intelligence portion.

 

However, a PhD candidate has decided to undergo higher education. ?? This is not a good transition into your refuting paragraph. For most people there is mandatory school that they have to participate in at an early age (i.e. the kinder garden to Grade 12 system). In these years a board decides a standerdized curriculum and there may be students who do not necessarily have to work hard because they are intelligent enough to grasp the material without hard work. The intelligent students may excel and become the top students in their class and therefore be considered academically successful. Conversely, there are students that are below normal intelligence who struggle to pass their courses even if they worked extremely hard. To these students, the curriculum is too challenging or not within their area of expertise, such as with autistic children, and they cannot succeed in a standardized academic environment.

This example lacks depth. Why is it that academic success in this case is more dependent on intelligence than hard work? A PhD student could be very intelligent and grasp concepts quickly as well. I'm sure that a lot of students work hard and can succeed in kindergarten-gr.12 years. This discussion is just not convincing.

 

Whether hard work supplements intelligence this is different than the writing prompt depends on the stage of development a student is at. Early years usually have standardized curriculum that may not be suited towards the students level of intelligence. You should discuss your supporting example first and then your refuting example. That is the more logical sequence of ideas. Later on as there is more choice a student may pick appropriate areas or areas that would challenge the intelligent student. Once that student has come to a stage where they are sufficiently challenged then more work is needed to master the subject and complete the components of a more vigorous curriculum. In the case of PhD candidates this requires completing a demanding comprehensive before approved start of research. Regardless, one thing that all academic institutions should strive for is to try and make the degrees or diplomas obtained reflect an educational experience where students feel they learned and worked hard for. This is off-topic. The standardized curriculum of the early years is wonderful as a way of assessment but there could be some flexibility to accelerate kids who grasp areas quickly versus kids who may require extra time and attention. That way students can work hard and still feel accomplished and successful in their academic careers. Again this is off-topic.

Overall, the contrast is not clear. The resolution principle of developmental level could work but it is not applied well here.

 

You have the basic structure of the writing sample down. However, the quality of ideas and depth of arguments requires improvement.

 

Overall Mark: 2/6 (Corresponds to approximately a L )

Breakdown (out of 6):

Addresses tasks: 2 Supporting task is somewhat addressed. Refuting task is weakly addressed. Resolution task is weakly addressed.

Depth: 2

Focus and coherence: 2.5

Grammar and vocabulary: 4