NewfieMike Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 So Newf... This is a neuroscientific question for you. Do guys use their peripheral vision to look at girls? Hypothetically speaking, here's a situation. A guy is sitting with his buddy and they're talking. A girl he likes passes by him and stands a couple of meters away, talking with her friends. The guy looks at the girl and stares (or w.e.). However, when he's looking at his buddy, is he at the same time peripherally keeping track of that girl over there? Also, what's this whole thing with guys staring at a girl? Are these the guys that are 100% confident and cocky or are they the ones that like the girl? And another question. Why the hell would a guy pay attention to what you do, when you do it, and with whom if he was not interested in you? I want answers... damn it! lol yeah, we are keeping track in the periphery but our main gaze is focused elsewhere. That's how I check out girls and still manage to do well in school. Staring at the girl isn't just the confident/cocky ones. Everyone does it. I'm afraid I can't answer your last question. But this reminds me of another thing about eye gaze. Say a really, REALLY hot girl is about to pass you in the hallway (just you and her, no one around). I, on purpose, do not look at her. Girls this hot are so used to getting checked out constantly. I like not giving her the benefit. I feel that if you think there's any chance there, you need to make her feel inadequate so she questions what's so special about you to not look at her. OMG I do that all the time! I can't believe you codified that into the play book! jeniuz! Most of what mike said is what guys do naturally I think. Hot girl walks by, you first notice, then its like "wait shes hot!" and you take a second look. If they catch you looking you want to play it off and not look like a stalker so you do the blink/shift gaze. Then theres nothing to overtly suggest you're a stalker but the girl goes into "wait was he checking me out?" and you let her think herself into a storm (girls are amazing at that) before you make the casual intro. No doubt she's been through all the good and bad "maybe he is...." and you just gotta show you're all the goods and none of the bads. There's another point that I think is important to bring up here, and that is timing of communication. You don't want to be the person who get's the last text in of the day. She'll know she has you roped in if you keep constantly replying. Say you're both texting, conversation is going pretty good. She says something sort of open-ended and not directly a question. Don't reply. Leave it for the day. Again, gotta keep 'em guessin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Don't want to be too nosey... but is this about the "i don't know/ coffee" guy or magnet dude? Whatever happened with him? Don't know you but here's a big e-hug for your not so indifferent indifference Well, my question to Newf was alluding to him, but I know plenty of guys who do this, so it turned into a general question. And thanks for the ehugs. I kind of need them right now. Being indifferent is horrible - it never works. yeah, we are keeping track in the periphery but our main gaze is focused elsewhere. That's how I check out girls and still manage to do well in school. Staring at the girl isn't just the confident/cocky ones. Everyone does it. I'm afraid I can't answer your last question. But this reminds me of another thing about eye gaze. Say a really, REALLY hot girl is about to pass you in the hallway (just you and her, no one around). I, on purpose, do not look at her. Girls this hot are so used to getting checked out constantly. I like not giving her the benefit. I feel that if you think there's any chance there, you need to make her feel inadequate so she questions what's so special about you to not look at her. Ok. Your answer clarifies so many thoughts in my mind. I thought that's what you guys do and I NOTICE it too. But I thought I was imagining things. I guess not. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
future_doc Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Guys love games. Scenario (true): Guy, a stranger, approaches at a get-together and says, "My friend over there would like to meet you but he is shy, Can I bring him over and introduce him?" It's a game, the other guy has no interest, it is th eone approaching who has already introduced himself and gotton the girl's name. Then, the other feloe comes over and introduces himself. Ice broken all around and there is potential for friendship if mutual interests etc. Or guy approaches and says, "Tell me, what kind of man interests you?". Reply to cut him down to size and get rid of him, "Not someone like you" as the girl turns in another direction. Girls sit in library within eye sight of hot guy, so he will definitely notice her but she doesn't give him a second glance. When he takes a break, so does she. She approaches him and asks a simple question, "Do you know what time the library closes? or, Do you know the time please? Ice broken. This can be done in reverse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerena Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 This and the blink/shift gaze are the reason so many girls fall asleep crying at night!! If you're interested, why not just put yourself out there and let her/ him know? Yes the games are fun but (just wondering) how long do you guys play these till you actually are clear on what you want? If I were single, I would hate to be played!! To be swayed to believe that someone likes me when they might not? Plain stupid. Don't get into the habit of playing these games. Just be upfront about it. And oh, by the way, sometimes guys think they are soooo clever by playing these stupid games. Girls too. I'm going to flirt with you and say cute things but I'm not interested, the bimbo over there is where my mind is actually at... and you'll never know because you're too scared to ask who I like Stupid lovegame. If you're not sure if the guy likes you, just ask him! Don't give him the satisfaction as being the girl he has tied around his finger. It's a control thing, too. Don't cave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted February 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 yeah, we are keeping track in the periphery but our main gaze is focused elsewhere. That's how I check out girls and still manage to do well in school. Staring at the girl isn't just the confident/cocky ones. Everyone does it. I'm afraid I can't answer your last question. But this reminds me of another thing about eye gaze. Say a really, REALLY hot girl is about to pass you in the hallway (just you and her, no one around). I, on purpose, do not look at her. Girls this hot are so used to getting checked out constantly. I like not giving her the benefit. I feel that if you think there's any chance there, you need to make her feel inadequate so she questions what's so special about you to not look at her. There's another point that I think is important to bring up here, and that is timing of communication. You don't want to be the person who get's the last text in of the day. She'll know she has you roped in if you keep constantly replying. Say you're both texting, conversation is going pretty good. She says something sort of open-ended and not directly a question. Don't reply. Leave it for the day. Again, gotta keep 'em guessin hahaha, holy ****. Everything you've said is almost identical to what I do, that's crazy. And the few times I've hooked up with chicks at parties, it's usually been due to these tactics. They're very interested in getting with me because of the prelude of playing these games with them for awhile. But to be honest, it's so frickin exhausting doing this stuff. Because it's all about waiting and being alert and doing the right thing everytime. You have to keep a girl guessing and then at the same time keep her from deciding to leave her interest in you. And the misses hurt after doing all this work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 If I were single, I would hate to be played!! To be swayed to believe that someone likes me when they might not? Plain stupid. Don't get into the habit of playing these games. Just be upfront about it. And oh, by the way, sometimes guys think they are soooo clever by playing these stupid games. Girls too. I'm going to flirt with you and say cute things but I'm not interested, the bimbo over there is where my mind is actually at... and you'll never know because you're too scared to ask who I like Stupid lovegame. If you're not sure if the guy likes you, just ask him! Don't give him the satisfaction as being the girl he has tied around his finger. It's a control thing, too. Don't cave. What if he has a gf? You still ask him? You call him out on it? lol. That wouldn't go quite well... me thinks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerena Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 What if he has a gf? You still ask him? You call him out on it? lol. That wouldn't go quite well... me thinks. He has a gf? I think I'm missing information here lol. What I said only applies if there are two single people. Now, if the dude has a gf... really? Why go for that? That's one huge ass mess if you ask me. GTFO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 He has a gf? I think I'm missing information here lol. What I said only applies if there are two single people. Now, if the dude has a gf... really? Why go for that? That's one huge ass mess if you ask me. GTFO. I was just hypothetically asking because you didn't specify. Now to mess even more: why not go for that? lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 What if he has a gf? You still ask him? You call him out on it? lol. That wouldn't go quite well... me thinks. lol. I'd call them out and make a huge scene. Drama makes life more interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerena Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 I was just hypothetically asking because you didn't specify. Now to mess even more: why not go for that? lol Bahaha! I like this post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Seriously Leap, this guy seems to be more trouble than anything. I think you should move on to the next one. If he has a gf, than he's clearly not for you. You should never even think about getting with someone who has a gf/bf, would you like some chick to want to hook up with your bf if the situation was reversed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerena Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 lol. I'd call them out and make a huge scene. Drama makes life more interesting. No thanks. I've watched The Hills... So much drama... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatonekid Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 No thanks. I've watched The Hills... So much drama... But is it interesting? (Serious question, I've never seen the show). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerena Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 But is it interesting? (Serious question, I've never seen the show). Oh, I loved it. But I mostly liked the aspect of Lauren Conrad developing into a designer. Not the drama... I like it when people are happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emma3 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 I would just man up and ask her out. I have gone out on dates with guys that I really wasn't that interested in but decided to give them a chance because I appreciate their courage and the fact that they just ask me out straight up instead of playing games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Seriously Leap, this guy seems to be more trouble than anything. I think you should move on to the next one. If he has a gf, than he's clearly not for you. You should never even think about getting with someone who has a gf/bf, would you like some chick to want to hook up with your bf if the situation was reversed? Karma, the only time I alluded to the guy I like was when I asked about the "look". The rest of the posts had nothing to do with him or me. I was just messing around. And to answer your question: no. I've had that happen to me before, where quite a few girls wanted to hook up with my bf and I would never do such a thing to someone else because I know how it feels. If you've been following my posts, you'd see that the situation I am in right now is quite a bit different, because unlike some other girls out there, I don't have the balls to go up to a guy and tell him I like him (whether he didn't have a gf or not). To accuse me of something I haven't done, never thought of and will never do is just plain rude (especially when you only know 1/4 of the story - ie you have no idea what is behind it or why everything is so messed up). Last time I checked, asking for a general opinion wasn't a crime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Leap, I didn't accuse you of anything. Sorry if it sounded that way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 lol. I'd call them out and make a huge scene. Drama makes life more interesting. Hahaha. Not when you're in it. Bahaha! I like this post I was just messing.... some people seem to take things way too seriously.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
future_doc Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Hey Karma was not being rude or accusatory, just commenting. Let's move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leap87 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Leap, I didn't accuse you of anything. Sorry if it sounded that way! Well, it did and this hurts my feelings, because the reason why my previous long-term relationship fell apart is because some 15 year old decided it would be fun to screw around with my ex (hence why he is my ex). I'd NEVER EVER think about doing something like that to anyone (no matter what kind of a nuthead/bimbo the girl is). Now I wonder why the hell do I even bother posting on this forum..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewfieMike Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Chin up, Leap. You're a good person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juice Posted February 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 how do you ask a guy out? smile at him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hking03 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Karma, the only time I alluded to the guy I like was when I asked about the "look". The rest of the posts had nothing to do with him or me. I was just messing around. And to answer your question: no. I've had that happen to me before, where quite a few girls wanted to hook up with my bf and I would never do such a thing to someone else because I know how it feels. If you've been following my posts, you'd see that the situation I am in right now is quite a bit different, because unlike some other girls out there, I don't have the balls to go up to a guy and tell him I like him (whether he didn't have a gf or not). To accuse me of something I haven't done, never thought of and will never do is just plain rude (especially when you only know 1/4 of the story - ie you have no idea what is behind it or why everything is so messed up). Last time I checked, asking for a general opinion wasn't a crime. when you only divulge a quarter of the story and ask for a general opinion... often times you end up with misguided information. i will say this: if you have a guy that you are flirting with or he is flirting with you or asking to date or hang out regularly in a "more than a friend" kind of way, and either one of you is dating another person it is not a good thing. the book says- stop until both parties are in a better situation. you may really like the guy, or the guy may really like you... but either party being attached to another person makes everybody look bad. edit: to clarify, this is not directed at Leap or anybody in general. just an opinion. I only bolded leaps statements because I thought it was funny to say asking for a general opinion wasn't a crime, but only divulging certain information would certainly impact the validity of the opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirop Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 smile at him. Doesn't work. It usually ends up with both of you being in friends zone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hking03 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 how do you ask a guy out? smile at him. speaking of smiles... did you guys hear about the walmart in the states a few years ago. apparently, (some) male customers were following/stalking female cashiers because they were smiling at them and saying "have a nice day"... i guess they took it as a cue that they were attracted to them, but in reality it was just their mandate from head office to smile and be polite. i think the store revoked the rule to smile at the customers. i remember hearing about this in my evolutionary psychology class... us guys can be really stupid... we're programmed to think every girl that smiles at us thinks we're the bomb! and yes, i said the bomb... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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