Doctors Dating Patients

[thebouque]

if i like my endocrinologist and she's handling my diabetes i see no reason why we shouldn't be allowed to start dating after she immediately refers me to another endo, etc.

 

Endos are rare you don't want to lose your endocrinologist just because of a one night stand

[tigars53]

Quote removed by request from the quotee

 

God that's so wrong

[rmorelan]

God thats so wrong

 

I just want to know if he got a refund on the counseling fees

[rmorelan]

I once heard of a doc who was at a party and "treated" someone by re-Rxing their birth control or some other benign drug. Ten years later they hooked up and he got in trouble afterward because he had established an official patient-doctor relationship and dated her, even 10 years after.

 

ok, that is just reaching the point of stupidity. The point of the rules to prevent abuse of power - can't see how that can even remotely happen in that case

[HopeToBeGreen]

honestly, outside of psychiatry (for obvious reasons that should be self evident) i don't see this as a faux paux at all, so im your doctor and treat your infection in the e.r., how does that create an inappropriate power relationship which might compromise the integrity of the profession, patient-doctor relationship or future relationship? the only caveat would be that you should immediately discontinue being the persons physician. if i like my endocrinologist and she's handling my diabetes i see no reason why we shouldn't be allowed to start dating after she immediately refers me to another endo, etc.

 

Medicine is best practiced where both doctor and patient understand that the only reason for the relationship is for the doctor to try to help the patient and that information the patient shares will be held strictly confidential and used only to help them. This is the basis of the therapeutic relationship and it makes it possible/easier for the patient to be completely open and honest with the physician.

 

I think that relationship is damaged if the patient believes that the physician may have other goals like evaluating possible relationship partners and that the patient may have to respond to a proposition from the doctor. Whenever any doctor turns a doctor-patient relationship into a sexual one it establishes that as a possibility and therefore potentially damages the ability of other doctors and patients to form a good therapeutic relationship.

[Erk]

Medicine is best practiced where both doctor and patient understand that the only reason for the relationship is for the doctor to try to help the patient and that information the patient shares will be held strictly confidential and used only to help them. This is the basis of the therapeutic relationship and it makes it possible/easier for the patient to be completely open and honest with the physician.

 

I think that relationship is damaged if the patient believes that the physician may have other goals like evaluating possible relationship partners and that the patient may have to respond to a proposition from the doctor. Whenever any doctor turns a doctor-patient relationship into a sexual one it establishes that as a possibility and therefore potentially damages the ability of other doctors and patients to form a good therapeutic relationship.

 

That's the standard answer; I personally am with Muse here. As with any professional individual, the patient-doctor relationship needs to include the caveat that doctors are humans, with the same emotions as anyone else. It wouldn't be inappropriate for a realtor to start dating the person whose home she sold, or for a lawyer to start dating a client in a personal injury case. Any doctor, whether interested in a patient or not, needs to be able to divorce his or her personal life from the task at hand, but I think it's at best kind of unfair to insist doctors are supposed to ignore any personal emotional compatibility with their patients. At worse, it encourages the dehumanising of both the doctor and the patient, and I don't think that is going to help anyone.

 

In my opinion, this kind of developing taboo is in fact endemic of a larger problem, with two causes/effects (you can decide if they're causes or effects). One is the worsening of potential problems in a doctor/patient relationship that extends outside of the clinic; in situations where previously this might have been a clean and unremarkable event, it becomes complicated, with extra levels of danger and secrecy. Another is that making such things a taboo is likely to make them seem more exotic and appealing: forbidding something always calls attention to it.

 

In other words, if people didn't get their panties in such a twist over this sort of thing, I suspect the situations where it became a problem would be so rare that I doubt anyone would really care. Perhaps someone armed with statistics could prove me wrong, of course.

[apache]

This would be true under the premise that someone goes into a physicians office with the a priori expectation that the physician is looking for a sexual relationship, but as Erk said, sometimes the unexpected happens and there's instantaneous chemistry, I don't think the doctor or patient had this in mind prior to the meeting but it just happened... like they say, you can't stop love!

 

You also forget that it's often the patient, or both the doctor and patient who wish to initiate a relationship, rather than the traditional paternalistic view that it would be the doctor on the prowl

 

Medicine is best practiced where both doctor and patient understand that the only reason for the relationship is for the doctor to try to help the patient and that information the patient shares will be held strictly confidential and used only to help them. This is the basis of the therapeutic relationship and it makes it possible/easier for the patient to be completely open and honest with the physician.

 

I think that relationship is damaged if the patient believes that the physician may have other goals like evaluating possible relationship partners and that the patient may have to respond to a proposition from the doctor. Whenever any doctor turns a doctor-patient relationship into a sexual one it establishes that as a possibility and therefore potentially damages the ability of other doctors and patients to form a good therapeutic relationship.

[thehockeykid]

what if the patient were to ask out the doctor or the paitient and doctor had a previous connection (went to highschool together)?

[quackster]

similar to that question - what if the doc writes a script for their bf/gf for something minor? Technically the bf/gf is now their patient, if even temporarily.

[tigars53]

similar to that question - what if the doc writes a script for their bf/gf for something minor? Technically the bf/gf is now their patient, if even temporarily.

 

This is under a totally different rule. Doctors can't treat close friends and members of the family, except for something very minor without any consequences or when it's a matter of life or death.

[Renin]

similar to that question - what if the doc writes a script for their bf/gf for something minor? Technically the bf/gf is now their patient, if even temporarily.

 

That's just bad practice ... they can go and wait like everyone else for their own doc, or go to a walk in, or find someone else to do it. I wouldn't write scripts for my friends/family.

[Curi0user]

I dont agree with dating family of current patients but I don't see what the big deal is about dating a former patient that doesn't require your care anymore.. I truly don't lol.

[thehumanmacbook]

I dont agree with dating family of current patients but I don't see what the big deal is about dating a former patient that doesn't require your care anymore.. I truly don't lol.

 

Because they might be in your care again due to unforeseen circumstances - like the psych example stated earlier, and lo and behold you have a conflict of interest.

 

Or maybe you were the surgeon that closed up her heart, something went wrong years later, and you have to do the consult. She's your patient.

[rmorelan]

what if the patient were to ask out the doctor or the paitient and doctor had a previous connection (went to highschool together)?

 

same rules apply That is actually an interview scenario they had me practice on.

[Curi0user]

Because they might be in your care again due to unforeseen circumstances - like the psych example stated earlier, and lo and behold you have a conflict of interest.

 

Or maybe you were the surgeon that closed up her heart, something went wrong years later, and you have to do the consult. She's your patient.

 

He said if it was something small its okay, and i agree with that. A fracture isnt a big deal lol.. and worst comes to worst, you get a different surgeon.. I don't see the issue.

[rmorelan]

That's just bad practice ... they can go and wait like everyone else for their own doc, or go to a walk in, or find someone else to do it. I wouldn't write scripts for my friends/family.

 

Yeah that is against the rules - there is almost no situation where prescribing to your family is acceptable.

[thehockeykid]

this is a bit of a shock to me, as I thought it would of been fine dating a previous paitent even if it was something minor or even treating a family member.

[Guest JustAnotherStudent]

Best solution: hire the hotest nurse, assistant, or secretary, and date her So, you would not be distracted by some less-attractive patients lolz~ For bonus, your lunch break at the clinic would be awesome too!

 

*just joking, seriously*

[future_doc]

This is already an occupational hazard for doctors, dentists and lawyers.

 

It is not about the "less-attractive patients" but rather about the more attractive. For sure there is enough tempation in the world without taking the unnecessary risk of pursuing a patient or giving in to a pursuit that crosses ethiucal lines.

[larva]

Best solution: hire the hotest nurse, assistant, or secretary, and date her So, you would not be distracted by some less-attractive patients lolz~ For bonus, your lunch break at the clinic would be awesome too!

 

*just joking, seriously*

 

her or him

[ldnk]

The college doesn't have a problem with ER docs dating after discharge either. I think the optics of discharge then immediately asking her out aren't kosher but I don't have a huge problem with that situation. There isn't ongoing care after the follow-up appointment, and thus it is unlikely that the woman would feel coerced into the date.

[ldnk]

I once heard of a doc who was at a party and "treated" someone by re-Rxing their birth control or some other benign drug. Ten years later they hooked up and he got in trouble afterward because he had established an official patient-doctor relationship and dated her, even 10 years after.

 

Either this happened 100 years ago under different rules, or its just an urban myth as a one-time prescription would not disqualify from any subsequent dating, especially over that time period unless the individual was being seen for psychiatric counseling.

[thehockeykid]

can doctors be friends with thier paitents (hanging out, catch a movie together, watch a baseball game)?

[tigars53]

can doctors be friends with thier paitents (hanging out, catch a movie together, watch a baseball game)?

 

Usually it's not recommended, but I never heard rules against it. In rural settings for example there is no way you can have friends if you're not friend with at least some of you patients.

[medobear]

I was listening to a podcast of “White Coat, Black Art” from CBC radio today. They interviewed a doctor who told the following story from his residency.

 

He was called to the ER to see a woman with a minor fracture. He found her very attractive. He treated her fracture and arrange for her to return to clinic for follow-up care. He then went out of his way to ensure that when she came to clinic she would see him (apparently this would not have happened necessarily). At her clinic visit he completed her treatment, discharged her from care and immediately asked her for a date rationalizing that since he was no longer treating her this was allowable.

 

What really shocked me was that he then went on to defend his actions saying that he would consider doing the same thing again. He felt that a doctor who had a brief encounter with a patient should be allowed to date the patient after the encounter was over. He also said that he thought it might be appropriate to date family members who come to the hospital with a patient (for example a pretty daughter who brings her elderly mother to the ER).

 

You can listen to the interview here: http://www.cbc.ca/whitecoat/episode/2011/06/30/white-coat-black-art-in-the-summer-boundaries-part-one/

 

The link to the podcast is at the bottom of the page and the interview is from 11:00 to 18:45.

 

Apparently the college guidelines are clear that you can't date a current patient but are pretty vague about former patients.

 

My personal opinion is that doctors should not date patients or former patients. I would allow that if a patient has a brief encounter with a doctor (say in the ER) then they meet again months later somewhere else then it might be okay to enter a relationship. I certainly never think it would be okay to proposition a patient or former patient at a hospital or other place where you practice.

 

I don’t think it would be okay to date family of a current patient because of the obvious power imbalance. The other person might feel that the care of their family member depends on keeping you happy in the relationship.

 

I’m wondering how other feel about this issue.

 

Anyone in pediatrics have similar story?