Thoughts On Living With Parents During Residency?

[shady]

I matched to a 5-year program in my parents' city, and I'm considering moving back with them to save some money. I've been living away for all of UG and med school. We have a great relationship, and they're happy to have me move back in.
 

I'm reluctant to move back. But after running some numbers, I'd save $15,000 to $20,000 annually in rent + utilities + some food costs, and this is A LOT of money. My LOC is large and I'd love to pay it off in residency.

 

How do people view residents who live with parents?

[JohnGrisham]

I matched to a 5-year program in my parents' city, and I'm considering moving back with them to save some money. I've been living away for all of UG and med school. We have a great relationship, and they're happy to have me move back in.

 

I'm reluctant to move back. But after running some numbers, I'd save $15,000 to $20,000 annually in rent + utilities + some food costs, and this is A LOT of money. My LOC is large and I'd love to pay it off in residency.

 

How do people view residents who live with parents?

I personally would never do it - but really it depends on your relationship with them, and their understanding of how residency works and life etc.

 

You'll be working long hours, coming and going etc. 

 

Do you have your own private space in the home? Like a suite of sorts?

 

I don't think the money saved would be worth it for me, but if you have a good relationship...even then, there is having a good relationship and then there is having one that would make sense with the stressors of residency.

 

I would say that since you didn't live at home for UG and med school...7-10 years away from home is a long time, and things have changed since you were in high school. 

 

Just 2 cents.

[Renin]

I wouldn't do it. My parents wanted me to, then I explained what call was. My parents said absolutely no. HAHAHA.

[criselda]

I second the above. I personally moved out of my parents' home for medical school and I could not see myself moving back in, despite having a good relationship with them.

 

I do know other residents who are also living with their parents, some who haven't moved away previously and others who moved back home. It is like you said a good way to save a chunk of money, so if both parties are able to work around your long hours and need for space then it could work.

 

Best case scenario is if you could live in their basement suite or something to guarantee privacy and some sort of separation; I would perhaps have considered that for myself if it was an option.

[Bambi]

It can work if you will have total privacy and ideally, a separate entrance. Of course, you will be putting on hold for 5 years building any potential relationship.

[FeministKilljoy]

Oh man. Would there be homemade food awaiting you when you walk through the door??! Sounds tempting.... 

[A-Stark]

It was never an option for me, but I still wouldn't have done it. True enough that I would save money and such but I can't imagine not having my own space now. 

 

On the other hand, it makes elective rotations away rather nice. 

[JohnGrisham]

I would just say this, if its only because of the money then dont bother. I mean when you finish residency, you'll likely be making really good money. Even as a resident you are making enough for cost of living. When you finish residency, would you be living with them too just to save rent?

 

It can make sense in some ways but other ways not either.

 

You could just try it out for the first few months and see how it goes. If fine then continue on. If not find your own place.

 

But make sure to really explain what residency is like.

[ieatpremeds]

To me such a decision would 100% depend on your relationship with your parents. I'm still a M1 but I'm starting to realize that this journey is going to be long and I may not get to spend as much time with my parents as I would like to. Time flies and personally I would love to be able to spend more time with parents when they are still relatively young and healthy. Just my opinion.

 

tldr; if you think you'll be happier living away from home, don't move back. $$ should not be your only reason in my opinion.

[shikimate]

I think it's quite a worthwhile consideration:

 

1) Some would argue it's not worth the money, well 20K x 5 yrs = 100K, that's not even accounting for interest you saved on your LOC. Remember just because Prime rate is low in 2016 doesn't mean it won't rise next year (In case you haven't heard the Fed in US already has already started to hike their rate, I personally believe BoC has reasons to do so within the foreseeable future). I imagine coming coming out of residency into practice is a big financial stressor, and even if you end up in a high paying specialty in such a stressful time the last thing you want to worry about is a ballooning LOC (what would happen if you need your LOC to buy capital or equipment for your new practice?)

 

2) You and your parents get along, that's fantastic. Little things like fresh cooked food and someone to greet you when you come home or sit down for dinner makes big psychological difference in residency. Also your parents will see how hard you work to establish yourself and this may help strengthen your bond with them. There's no better insurance in life than supportive parents.

 

Now some considerations for the other side of the coin:

 

1) Is your parent's home close to your hospital? Commute is a hassle, especially in a large city, on a tight resident's schedule. If your parent's house is far away then the money you save may not worth the added time for commute, and may add inconvenience to your already hectic life.

 

2) Will you have lots of visitors to your residence? Will you have intimate visitor(s) to your residence? How concerned are your parents about their own privacy and how will your presence impact their own work/live? Is your lifestyle vastly different than that of your parents? Are there other siblings or tenants who live on the same premise?

[amichel]

I'm definitely going to consider it if I can manage to match back home.

 

Like someone above said, I've started to realize I want to spend more time with them while I can.

 

I definitely think it comes down to whether you'd have a suite with a separate entrance. If you do (I would), I really don't think it's a deal breaker for dating, either (assuming your parents are okay with that).

[shady]

Thank you very much for your comments! Definitely not an easy question to answer

 

shikmate and ieatpremeds raise excellent points. Bambi, I sure hope that's not the case!

 

I know my future income will be good, but there's something psychological about having more debt than assets that really bothers me. Paying off that LOC asap is important

 

While I haven't decided yet, I think I'm leaning towards giving it a try. If things don't go well, moving out is always an option for next year

[Med0123]

I would definitely do it if I was in your shoes!