Rant about life thread

[thehockeykid]

I had a midterm today i slept for only 4 hrs. After I see my crush in the library who i didn't see since last school yr. I looked like a homeless person, hoodie and so tired.

[futureGP]

I had a midterm today i slept for only 4 hrs. After I see my crush in the library who i didn't see since last school yr. I looked like a homeless person, hoodie and so tired.

 

hang in there trooper

[thehockeykid]

bunch of assignments that i do not want to do

[apache]

give em hell!

 

bunch of assignments that i do not want to do

[NeuroPreMed]

bunch of assignments that i do not want to do

 

Pound through them and it'll feel that much better when you're on the other side.

[apache]

yeah, my philosophy, is kicking ass is a lot more fun than just mailing it in, if you're gonna work hard enough to be good, you might as well put in that extra bit and have a really cool life... im guessing that's more cause i get bored really quick though, lol...

 

Pound through them and it'll feel that much better when you're on the other side.

[NeuroPreMed]

yeah, my philosophy, is kicking ass is a lot more fun than just mailing it in, if you're gonna work hard enough to be good, you might as well put in that extra bit and have a really cool life... im guessing that's more cause i get bored really quick though, lol...

 

Sounds pretty accurate to me

[apache]

yeah, if i had my way, i'd be on a plane every few days... lol... give it a decade or so... i wanna do a gabor mate/tom delonge fusion thing maybe, lol

[NeuroPreMed]

yeah, if i had my way, i'd be on a plane every few days... lol... give it a decade or so... i wanna do a gabor mate/tom delonge fusion thing maybe, lol

 

Don't forget the little people when you do haha.

[apache]

lol, we're all little people... or all big people, i guess i mean people are people... lol, i probably have the most diverse friend group of anyone i know, lol, i often have to keep certain types away from each other and play mix match when i get a group of 3 together... i guess when you're chillin with a clothing designer in their studio one day and a wilder person the next it sort of paint's the picture

 

Don't forget the little people when you do haha.

[apache]

you know what's pretty cool, i just stumbled across a paper on neuro peptide y that was pretty clinical, and they're like so how does it actually, beyond direct agonism alleviate anxiety and depression... they had no clue... and last week i just read a book all about what i was mentioning in the other thread it was just info overload, pretty amazing how fast things move, eh?

 

Sounds pretty accurate to me

[NeuroPreMed]

you know what's pretty cool, i just stumbled across a paper on neuro peptide y that was pretty clinical, and they're like so how does it actually, beyond direct agonism alleviate anxiety and depression... they had no clue... and last week i just read a book all about what i was mentioning in the other thread it was just info overload, pretty amazing how fast things move, eh?

 

No doubt, did you find that paper online?

[apache]

lol, nah, it was literally sitting on my coffee table as brought back the morning brew, lol

 

No doubt, did you find that paper online?

[NeuroPreMed]

lol, nah, it was literally sitting on my coffee table as brought back the morning brew, lol

 

Damnit, what paper was it in?

[apache]

neuropeptides.. mar, 04.. the nyp system in stress, anxiety and depression... i gotta go grab a second cup... i guess literally, lol

 

Damnit, what paper was it in?

[NeuroPreMed]

neuropeptides.. mar, 04.. the nyp system in stress, anxiety and depression... i gotta go grab a second cup... i guess literally, lol

 

Hahah, that's funny. I'm not a second cup fan.

 

Where do you get that? I want to read this article.

[apache]

if you sign onto your uni library account you should be able to print it off most likely

 

it's hilarious how when you read research (as in last weeks stuff, weekly) opiates actually may be a good short term augmentation for affective stuff... but politics would get you in trouble, thank's authortarian public health care... it's kinda silly too, cause like, it's so political, like... yeah, i still hear clinicians refer to ketamine as horse tranquilizer, say n-acetyl cysteine is bunk, the dsm's great... it's kinda cute, till i explain the cellular mechanisms and emergent second messenger and downreg streams in detail, name the antiporter nac uses to prevent glutamate excitotoxicity, and treat trichotilimania and to a lesser extent ocd... in addition to that tid bit the venerable authority i'm speaking to will always go to when they've got nothing... evidence based researcher... yeah, when i talk to you, i'm not wrong guy, because i guess i'm a tad ecclectic (euphemism for things are really complex, toss out your bible dsm before i explain it's 50 year history in detail... as well as it's serious fundamental methodological flaws... and extend this to 3 minutes when we knew who was wright 2 minutes and thirty seconds ago, the person who's always questioning because they don't know anything, interesting... humility par excellance... guess i dont need a white coat or suit to portray i'm sorta good... must annoy people

 

Hahah, that's funny. I'm not a second cup fan.

 

Where do you get that? I want to read this article.

[NeuroPreMed]

if you sign onto your uni library account you should be able to print it off most likely

 

it's hilarious how when you read research (as in last weeks stuff, weekly) opiates actually may be a good short term augmentation for affective stuff... but politics would get you in trouble, thank's authortarian public health care... it's kinda silly too, cause like, it's so political, like... yeah, i still hear clinicians refer to ketamine as horse tranquilizer, say n-acetyl cysteine is bunk, the dsm's great... it's kinda cute, till i explain the cellular mechanisms and emergent second messenger and downreg streams in detail, name the antiporter nac uses to prevent glutamate excitotoxicity, and treat trichotilimania and to a lesser extent ocd... in addition to that tid bit the venerable authority i'm speaking to will always go to when they've got nothing... evidence based researcher... yeah, when i talk to you, i'm not wrong guy, because i guess i'm a tad ecclectic (euphemism for things are really complex, toss out your bible dsm before i explain it's 50 year history in detail... as well as it's serious fundamental methodological flaws... and extend this to 3 minutes when we knew who was wright 2 minutes and thirty seconds ago, the person who's always questioning because they don't know anything, interesting... humility par excellance... guess i dont need a white coat or suit to portray i'm sorta good... must annoy people

 

School fail...We don't have it haha

[apache]

I seriously know like 5 percent of what I know from school, and to me, this is something I've lived through, vicariously, results are the end game, I really could never care if everything I set as a goal didn't have a personal, salient motivation. I know I'm good, I hear it everyday, but I'm good cause I'm passionate, my goals are so intensely important because of what I've seen that I just... make sure there's no doubt, it's frusterating often though, because finding people as voracious, or at least willing to choose their own destiny , is pretty semi-rare, lol.

School fail...We don't have it haha

[NeuroPreMed]

I seriously know like 5 percent of what I know from school, and to me, this is something I've lived through, vicariously, results are the end game, I really could never care if everything I set as a goal didn't have a personal, salient motivation. I know I'm good, I hear it everyday, but I'm good cause I'm passionate, my goals are so intensely important because of what I've seen that I just... make sure there's no doubt, it's frusterating often though, because finding people as voracious, or at least willing to choose their own destiny , is pretty semi-rare, lol.

 

Rather sad how true that is haha. Everyone tries to be what others want them to be or they do what the norm is and so on and so forth.

[Birdy]

I have worked hard all semester to get good grades. My first bio midterm, I got 96% (class avg around 65%.)

 

We just wrote another midterm on Monday. I got 95%. The vast majority of the class failed miserably. As in, average was way below 50%.

 

So, instead of having each midterm count for 12%, he's offering a rewrite to anyone who wants it, and will take the highest mark of the three.

 

I'm not doing the rewrite. Just mildly annoyed that my hard work for that second midterm doesn't count.

[NeuroPreMed]

I have worked hard all semester to get good grades. My first bio midterm, I got 96% (class avg around 65%.)

 

We just wrote another midterm on Monday. I got 95%. The vast majority of the class failed miserably. As in, average was way below 50%.

 

So, instead of having each midterm count for 12%, he's offering a rewrite to anyone who wants it, and will take the highest mark of the three.

 

I'm not doing the rewrite. Just mildly annoyed that my hard work for that second midterm doesn't count.

 

Hard work always counts.

[apache]

contrary to pop belief, i do like to maintain some privacy, but i don't lose, period... unless you time constrain me, if you don't i just extend the process until i own yet another librarian. i tend to be pretty open, but some stuff i'm quiet about, and well, no offense to big companies and firms, but when i'm getting on my third hand of fingers without losing, as a petty individual they thought they'd throw some law degrees at (more or less a degree in library studies and research, i have a huge creative, and stratospheric linguistic advantage, i can look up case law too, and my fried amygdala is telling of the fact that three years isn't nearly enough of a head start, because i strive for certainty, i'll kill you, then nail you with minutia that leaves a sense of of confusion... i'll still never forget this public defender... an obvious moron, and how he jested i had a hobby with the law... the joke turns serious when i ask for the relevant acts, and let's just say a poor lady who's upbringing meant a yes to the police, even when the words are lost in translation, and even for a bottom of the class u of s lawyer... which made me chuckle at his snideness a bit, because i knew his deal was getting min prosecution for illegal activities that went on in a home she owned less than 5 percent off... pursuant to open avenues to a civil suit and claims her 7 figure home were proceeds of crime, which was agriegous, as they seemed more concerned with her than the relative who was carrying out the crimes in the original residence... i imagine a bonus was in store... yeah, nepostic wheeling can make you a good living in law, but seriously, like i said, once those acts were in the bag, you're done... like, you're talking to someone who finds lies in documents by noting small coincidental dates people overlook, and 400 pages in, that can add up... so yeah... i guess bud is suitable council for someone who doesn't speak english, but if i ever do law after medicine or something, i'll finally get to stop preaching about the artificial sense of standardization in a profession, since well, skills pay, because private industry doesn't have the same billing code for dr. house and mail it in, avoid unconventionalities to keep it safe, and hide from having to make that call, or generate that solution... in the u.s. those guys work in a wal mart and are paid accordingly... here, it's the same billing code as your hospitals best interest... yeah, if i come off as an elitist, i'm not, but just passing to me is laughable, i remember talking with the dean and being the only one that though p/f was bs... we don't need undergrad spectrums, but maybe a 5 point scale or something... cause if i had my autonomy strangleholded, on top of working within a structuralist paradigm which serves professions before patients (the more nebulous the discipline, the less the frcps conveys anything, yet we limit ourselves to, at times, simplistic and standardized approaches, which work when say you see person x, and he throw's anti-convulsant dejour at you... then you could see me, and not only will you manage, you'll know when you're side affect allleviating combination delayed delivery system will come out, and you'll know piquing my interest not only concluded my disorder, but explained the exclusion patients, and patients with similar symptoms as those seen in psych, but disciplines don't really communicate in this age of subspecialize to be valuable (which is honestly such bs, people who have extreme depth in a breadth of topics are the rarest, most valuable... think, not only can you claim strained relationship on your lawsuit for mobbing in the workplace (yeah, i know soc quite a bit too) and have a collection of 15 articles on peer assesment in medicine... the experts down in waterloo... remember how i mentioned... lawyers:librarians... and not even creative.. but back to the point, my strong background n neuro means i can explain a ton of psychosomatic things too, and well, if you understand fundamentals, you know where to look, then again... pass fails the old mechanic system, right... that's not my thing, and while people say you get the horses, i get them anyways, plus a ton of zebra's... so yeah, maybe we should base carms on like talent, or effort, iuno... whatev, there's always the united states of kick ass, be cool, instead of showing interest and flying under the radar... and i guess that's more my thing, then again, my specific area's of concern is currently a sketch, and someone needs to fill in the detail, so yeah, i guess being good not to kill someone doesn't cut it, but honestly, once you build enough of a base, learnings fun, because it's practical... and not only won't i kill anyone, i might be able to change a few people's view, and by a few, i mean, ****, a lot, cause when you go down the whole mental health money pit, which takes away from so many other resources, enthusiasm, soon enough wont be enough, because value is measured in as much as you take off public books as how much you add... and well, no other medical field, can chop so much cost off so infrastructurally steeply, it just has to convince the best and brightest that it's a respectable endeavor, cause while psych is bull**** to most people, the top psych's in the hospital are lifesavers, and people are apprechiative, because it's a skill that's hard to pick up via the old didadactic.. plus, people really need to lay off the i'm the professinal, you're the patient thing, oh yeah, maybe that's why i can get that whole rapport and disclosure thing, one part acting, another empathy, the third non-judgment... and not the painfully obvious forced hippy kind, the i've seen way worse than this so it's seriously not a big deal kind... yeah, that's hard to do when you take yourself seriously, because those professional markers don't get in the way of accupril, metroprolol, and atorvostatan most seniors walk out of their gp with... prob helps build trust actually, unfortunately, to jump from bs psychiatry to good psychiatrist, you sort of have to stop selling the paternalistic stuff to the gullible, even though it may help you get over the fact that your not a real doctor, it won't matter in a few months when homeless borderline patient er want's nothing to do with, let along his shings... and you can calm him down easy... hero to zero, cause all that matters is you served the purpose your protocol often guides you too... except 9 line checklists sort of mean that ionevitably you get the department member specializing in 10 minute drug consults, and the one who handles with ease the prior... which the white coat speed demon doesn't see because he specializes in psychosis and mania... just like everyone else who can go on the who website and download the clinical prescribing algorithim... yeah... specialists, i guess contrarily i know docs that don't see psychosis because they know their talents must be used efficiently, with those people who are incurable, until you do it, and that contingency grows, but like i said a while back... when you attach temporality, artificial frameworks in which to measure success, you fail, but when things are open, and you're 12 for 12 with an untreatable population, albeit with a 14 month average investment... that famous canadian psychologist alberta bandura just made your realize, this is kind of special, because anyone can repair a fracture... personally i'd take the thanks with ease, but few have the patience, flexibility, depth, knowledge, stemming from an intrinsic emotional basis as well as from devoted study, to say they got johny to love life, after he spent the better part of the last decade trying to kill himself... yeah, that's a bit different... something you have to feel to get... not that i'm dissing solid surgeons, or the behaviourally derived prescriptions, on hunches, who hears abilify doesn't cause wait (might have something to do with d1, and d2... throw in 5htc3... but who cares... when 1 percent of the pop needs that time which more thoughtful colleagues require to deal with the undealables, then we end up maximizing output, right... sorta like sending mcsorley out there to lay 20 hits so gretz can play 20 minutes and get the hat trick... most of the hits are the same, but without them, gretzy wouldn't have the time of day to attend to goal scoring... which, going back to econ101 is a pretty sick sunk cost...

 

yeah, hmmm, that's supposed to be a challenge to all the aspiring people who think getting is the bees knees, until it's obvious no one cares if you get an a in clinical skills, it's more 6 months later, you asking a colleague gue where you asking a colleague where mr so and so went, and laughing that he prob took off to florida, because like photo radar... or 4 behavioural psych classes teaches, lackof temporal contingency means minimal aversion, not even for guilts sake, but to proclude repeats

 

yeah, wow, go, go... i'm getting a little more ostentatious, minus the ostentatiousnesses because me seeminging ostentatious doesn't mean i am, since everyone tells me i'm smart, really skilled and humorously, i think i'm pretty average, in my eyes, just passionate, so yeah, forget the proving that... yeah, maybe i just like to think out loud during post's or something, beat's reading for sure i... i'f i read this and didn't know how much of a rl goof i was i'd probably think it sounded cocky too... but seriously, it's soooooo much fun when you don't have to prove stuff anymore, or try... you just have to make sure you get those ends... and even that's all the more easier... i don't need to be a big shot dermatologist to feel good about myself, i already do, because public speaking, always being on the edge, yet comfortable, because it's what you know, and you're steady, despite other's inferences your risky... nah, not at all, they only seem risky because poor assesment of others phenomenelogical experience and of the limit of social norm... and well, that's natural, most people aren't deep and open with others, and extrapolate from behaviour... sort of like a gallup pole of 3, contra the your the first person i've told you hear a few hundred times over a couple thousand hours, mostly with strangers... basically, things seem risky when you ignore the obvious, because don't have the statistical power of others experience to know even the most prude among us are like sort of weird on the social-behavioral extrapolation scale... then again, i get what i want, no? because i wrecklessly challenged a telecome companies barage of salaried, unmotivated lawyers, who were used to dealing with, at most, persistent whiners... see, the stat power thing... prob similar reason i don't give the time of day to titles, it's hard to when the annoying ones try and shut you down and you're sort of being add zoning into another convo making them look retarded at the same time, cause multi-tasking's more your thing... yeah, once the walls fall down, you learn to push yourself... but playing smart... i don't mean smart, i mean well forget tactics against brute force, because i might just ask you why the ring even needs ropes (back to the joe frazer mo ali ref, lol, i don't feel you can be giving it all, giving it your all, i feel you have to utilize every tool around you the maximize your ends... just think 90's yankees, when winning's the goal, why not double the budget even after you have the best team in baseball, because going from 1 to 1 is superficially similar, but the measure is in how much trouble you get to the championship

 

wanna call me an idiot, say my views are retarded, that'd rock my world, i love differen't perspectives perceive that because sometimes i talk naturally in a way that's... look for a sea world euphism here, lol... self-assured and confident... and i know a ton of people that would go right back on me in person

 

haha, i always just start writing this and float into hyperfocus mode, i know for a fact this like collection has no unifying thesis, but **** it, have fun reading... and take home this message... lol, the one on top is the one who keeps getting back up, because what others miss is every attempt means new skills gained, more perspective, greater resiliency, certainty your hard effort will pay off (something i rely on, and cavemanlike as it sounds... the only way i know to do it is by outworking competing interests to an extent where i don't have to worry about random variables, the butterfly effect becomes a sort of non factor, like a bed of needles of sorts, because every point of failure is interconnected with 25 other supports... i always think of a brute force algorithim in chess, even though my comp sci friends say im an idiot, but in the end, that's what it is...so yeah... do that, then success is assured, and motivation steams easily... also, make sure your working towards something like not being a loan manager, because statistically, if you're reading this, you'd find it boring... minus the challenge of napping between customers, lol

 

Rather sad how true that is haha. Everyone tries to be what others want them to be or they do what the norm is and so on and so forth.

[NeuroPreMed]

contrary to pop belief, i do like to maintain some privacy, but i don't lose, period... unless you time constrain me, if you don't i just extend the process until i own yet another librarian. i tend to be pretty open, but some stuff i'm quiet about, and well, no offense to big companies and firms, but when i'm getting on my third hand of fingers without losing, as a petty individual they thought they'd throw some law degrees at (more or less a degree in library studies and research, i have a huge creative, and stratospheric linguistic advantage, i can look up case law too, and my fried amygdala is telling of the fact that three years isn't nearly enough of a head start, because i strive for certainty, i'll kill you, then nail you with minutia that leaves a sense of of confusion... i'll still never forget this public defender... an obvious moron, and how he jested i had a hobby with the law... the joke turns serious when i ask for the relevant acts, and let's just say a poor lady who's upbringing meant a yes to the police, even when the words are lost in translation, and even for a bottom of the class u of s lawyer... which made me chuckle at his snideness a bit, because i knew his deal was getting min prosecution for illegal activities that went on in a home she owned less than 5 percent off... pursuant to open avenues to a civil suit and claims her 7 figure home were proceeds of crime, which was agriegous, as they seemed more concerned with her than the relative who was carrying out the crimes in the original residence... i imagine a bonus was in store... yeah, nepostic wheeling can make you a good living in law, but seriously, like i said, once those acts were in the bag, you're done... like, you're talking to someone who finds lies in documents by noting small coincidental dates people overlook, and 400 pages in, that can add up... so yeah... i guess bud is suitable council for someone who doesn't speak english, but if i ever do law after medicine or something, i'll finally get to stop preaching about the artificial sense of standardization in a profession, since well, skills pay, because private industry doesn't have the same billing code for dr. house and mail it in, avoid unconventionalities to keep it safe, and hide from having to make that call, or generate that solution... in the u.s. those guys work in a wal mart and are paid accordingly... here, it's the same billing code as your hospitals best interest... yeah, if i come off as an elitist, i'm not, but just passing to me is laughable, i remember talking with the dean and being the only one that though p/f was bs... we don't need undergrad spectrums, but maybe a 5 point scale or something... cause if i had my autonomy strangleholded, on top of working within a structuralist paradigm which serves professions before patients (the more nebulous the discipline, the less the frcps conveys anything, yet we limit ourselves to, at times, simplistic and standardized approaches, which work when say you see person x, and he throw's anti-convulsant dejour at you... then you could see me, and not only will you manage, you'll know when you're side affect allleviating combination delayed delivery system will come out, and you'll know piquing my interest not only concluded my disorder, but explained the exclusion patients, and patients with similar symptoms as those seen in psych, but disciplines don't really communicate in this age of subspecialize to be valuable (which is honestly such bs, people who have extreme depth in a breadth of topics are the rarest, most valuable... think, not only can you claim strained relationship on your lawsuit for mobbing in the workplace (yeah, i know soc quite a bit too) and have a collection of 15 articles on peer assesment in medicine... the experts down in waterloo... remember how i mentioned... lawyers:librarians... and not even creative.. but back to the point, my strong background n neuro means i can explain a ton of psychosomatic things too, and well, if you understand fundamentals, you know where to look, then again... pass fails the old mechanic system, right... that's not my thing, and while people say you get the horses, i get them anyways, plus a ton of zebra's... so yeah, maybe we should base carms on like talent, or effort, iuno... whatev, there's always the united states of kick ass, be cool, instead of showing interest and flying under the radar... and i guess that's more my thing, then again, my specific area's of concern is currently a sketch, and someone needs to fill in the detail, so yeah, i guess being good not to kill someone doesn't cut it, but honestly, once you build enough of a base, learnings fun, because it's practical... and not only won't i kill anyone, i might be able to change a few people's view, and by a few, i mean, ****, a lot, cause when you go down the whole mental health money pit, which takes away from so many other resources, enthusiasm, soon enough wont be enough, because value is measured in as much as you take off public books as how much you add... and well, no other medical field, can chop so much cost off so infrastructurally steeply, it just has to convince the best and brightest that it's a respectable endeavor, cause while psych is bull**** to most people, the top psych's in the hospital are lifesavers, and people are apprechiative, because it's a skill that's hard to pick up via the old didadactic.. plus, people really need to lay off the i'm the professinal, you're the patient thing, oh yeah, maybe that's why i can get that whole rapport and disclosure thing, one part acting, another empathy, the third non-judgment... and not the painfully obvious forced hippy kind, the i've seen way worse than this so it's seriously not a big deal kind... yeah, that's hard to do when you take yourself seriously, because those professional markers don't get in the way of accupril, metroprolol, and atorvostatan most seniors walk out of their gp with... prob helps build trust actually, unfortunately, to jump from bs psychiatry to good psychiatrist, you sort of have to stop selling the paternalistic stuff to the gullible, even though it may help you get over the fact that your not a real doctor, it won't matter in a few months when homeless borderline patient er want's nothing to do with, let along his shings... and you can calm him down easy... hero to zero, cause all that matters is you served the purpose your protocol often guides you too... except 9 line checklists sort of mean that ionevitably you get the department member specializing in 10 minute drug consults, and the one who handles with ease the prior... which the white coat speed demon doesn't see because he specializes in psychosis and mania... just like everyone else who can go on the who website and download the clinical prescribing algorithim... yeah... specialists, i guess contrarily i know docs that don't see psychosis because they know their talents must be used efficiently, with those people who are incurable, until you do it, and that contingency grows, but like i said a while back... when you attach temporality, artificial frameworks in which to measure success, you fail, but when things are open, and you're 12 for 12 with an untreatable population, albeit with a 14 month average investment... that famous canadian psychologist alberta bandura just made your realize, this is kind of special, because anyone can repair a fracture... personally i'd take the thanks with ease, but few have the patience, flexibility, depth, knowledge, stemming from an intrinsic emotional basis as well as from devoted study, to say they got johny to love life, after he spent the better part of the last decade trying to kill himself... yeah, that's a bit different... something you have to feel to get... not that i'm dissing solid surgeons, or the behaviourally derived prescriptions, on hunches, who hears abilify doesn't cause wait (might have something to do with d1, and d2... throw in 5htc3... but who cares... when 1 percent of the pop needs that time which more thoughtful colleagues require to deal with the undealables, then we end up maximizing output, right... sorta like sending mcsorley out there to lay 20 hits so gretz can play 20 minutes and get the hat trick... most of the hits are the same, but without them, gretzy wouldn't have the time of day to attend to goal scoring... which, going back to econ101 is a pretty sick sunk cost...

 

yeah, hmmm, that's supposed to be a challenge to all the aspiring people who think getting is the bees knees, until it's obvious no one cares if you get an a in clinical skills, it's more 6 months later, you asking a colleague gue where you asking a colleague where mr so and so went, and laughing that he prob took off to florida, because like photo radar... or 4 behavioural psych classes teaches, lackof temporal contingency means minimal aversion, not even for guilts sake, but to proclude repeats

 

yeah, wow, go, go... i'm getting a little more ostentatious, minus the ostentatiousnesses because me seeminging ostentatious doesn't mean i am, since everyone tells me i'm smart, really skilled and humorously, i think i'm pretty average, in my eyes, just passionate, so yeah, forget the proving that... yeah, maybe i just like to think out loud during post's or something, beat's reading for sure i... i'f i read this and didn't know how much of a rl goof i was i'd probably think it sounded cocky too... but seriously, it's soooooo much fun when you don't have to prove stuff anymore, or try... you just have to make sure you get those ends... and even that's all the more easier... i don't need to be a big shot dermatologist to feel good about myself, i already do, because public speaking, always being on the edge, yet comfortable, because it's what you know, and you're steady, despite other's inferences your risky... nah, not at all, they only seem risky because poor assesment of others phenomenelogical experience and of the limit of social norm... and well, that's natural, most people aren't deep and open with others, and extrapolate from behaviour... sort of like a gallup pole of 3, contra the your the first person i've told you hear a few hundred times over a couple thousand hours, mostly with strangers... basically, things seem risky when you ignore the obvious, because don't have the statistical power of others experience to know even the most prude among us are like sort of weird on the social-behavioral extrapolation scale... then again, i get what i want, no? because i wrecklessly challenged a telecome companies barage of salaried, unmotivated lawyers, who were used to dealing with, at most, persistent whiners... see, the stat power thing... prob similar reason i don't give the time of day to titles, it's hard to when the annoying ones try and shut you down and you're sort of being add zoning into another convo making them look retarded at the same time, cause multi-tasking's more your thing... yeah, once the walls fall down, you learn to push yourself... but playing smart... i don't mean smart, i mean well forget tactics against brute force, because i might just ask you why the ring even needs ropes (back to the joe frazer mo ali ref, lol, i don't feel you can be giving it all, giving it your all, i feel you have to utilize every tool around you the maximize your ends... just think 90's yankees, when winning's the goal, why not double the budget even after you have the best team in baseball, because going from 1 to 1 is superficially similar, but the measure is in how much trouble you get to the championship

 

wanna call me an idiot, say my views are retarded, that'd rock my world, i love differen't perspectives perceive that because sometimes i talk naturally in a way that's... look for a sea world euphism here, lol... self-assured and confident... and i know a ton of people that would go right back on me in person

 

haha, i always just start writing this and float into hyperfocus mode, i know for a fact this like collection has no unifying thesis, but **** it, have fun reading... and take home this message... lol, the one on top is the one who keeps getting back up, because what others miss is every attempt means new skills gained, more perspective, greater resiliency, certainty your hard effort will pay off (something i rely on, and cavemanlike as it sounds... the only way i know to do it is by outworking competing interests to an extent where i don't have to worry about random variables, the butterfly effect becomes a sort of non factor, like a bed of needles of sorts, because every point of failure is interconnected with 25 other supports... i always think of a brute force algorithim in chess, even though my comp sci friends say im an idiot, but in the end, that's what it is...so yeah... do that, then success is assured, and motivation steams easily... also, make sure your working towards something like not being a loan manager, because statistically, if you're reading this, you'd find it boring... minus the challenge of napping between customers, lol

 

God damn paragraphs man! Haha, I'll need to read this when class is over:rolleyes:

[apache]

btw, to the guy who wanted to learn to study better, this is called synthetic thought, as in, i remember one thing i learn, and from say a set of rules procured by that fact generate a realm of possibility, question what i say, look for holes..., sorry i just remembered that post where someone said rote reading of textbooks was efficient and laughed... i guess that's how you learn english too, read a lot, but never speak... most people who attempt to master language would like to use it, rather than have a handy pair of knowledgible ears to interpret other writers who can light it up... so yeah, you write... it's sort of, not even a metaphor, yeah, you got it, simile... see my goal is to think, which is why i gloss the grammar, but writing to me is like math is to all the non north american people in our math department... cause i do it, not observe it, even gloss over with shiny markers... do... it's like thinking... anyhoo, the research is pretty conclusive anyways, synthethic approaches means you're reading a chapter probably like 4 or 5 times to pick up what i got the first time through, although i may have taken longer, maybe... often synthetic approaches are a lot funner so you actually not only retain, but are fast... because after all, synthesis means continued chunks of focus in generative thinking... which at least keeps you off facebook... and later in life, off of what lays beyond campus for hours on end... yeah... go learning pyramid... teach (why i perfer the ui-directionality of posting when im solidifying something i know well, but the company of others to listen and engage a new topic... yeah, secrets out, i'm not out to change yr old kids minds... and the endless drivel is sort of funny, because it illustrates my very point... the approach we teach procures poor attention, persistence in face of obscurity (read heidegger... only author i went **** it with and coles notes it... and i spent 4 hours trying to read the first 5 pages), do, discuss, listen and watch are the same i think, although for me, although for me the prior stays and the latter goes to the garbage, then like what? passive reading and didactic classroom teaching... yeah, so i guess that dude is gettting his full 10 percent... love for all god's creatures, but i'll take my 80-90 percent, away from libraries, with loud music, and often in public, cause that's what works for me... which begs the questions, are many students in k-12 poor, or is our education system poor at procuring their interests... like, wouldn't doing a home video on the civil war be a lot cooler than writing a paper... well, i like writing so... i guess it would def be cooler than memorizing random dates, because you gain a layered nuanced understanding, and your episodic memory serves to support the semantics... ditto with your limbic system and how much more film can get your emotions, and emotional associations, a strong prime for memory, going, when you're reading about topics far removed, and seemingly irrelevant to your life... while at 17 u have to sit at a desk... which, i'll add, i haven't done at all writing these last two posts... as well as ask for permission to pee... and if you're actually the smart type that teachers say are bored.. how lame is it choosing one of two opinions, how about i develop my own, non-monolithic opinion... which doesn't assume my worldview can be deduced by highly co-correlated values often held by the, uhh, simpletons... nice, well meaning, but a bit too much, this is right, this is wrong... believe me, nothing is, i guess i learned that one talking to a big time dealer i met walking home awaiting sentencing who actually had very noble intentions of helping a disabled mother... 8 hours later the guy was crying... so yeah, school, books, i guess you can learn empathy, trying to extrapolate and vicariously experience another's reality... and while you never completely will, i'm guessing my way will get you a lot closer than a book on abnormal psych... yeah... im gonna get back to work now... lol

 

contrary to pop belief, i do like to maintain some privacy, but i don't lose, period... unless you time constrain me, if you don't i just extend the process until i own yet another librarian. i tend to be pretty open, but some stuff i'm quiet about, and well, no offense to big companies and firms, but when i'm getting on my third hand of fingers without losing, as a petty individual they thought they'd throw some law degrees at (more or less a degree in library studies and research, i have a huge creative, and stratospheric linguistic advantage, i can look up case law too, and my fried amygdala is telling of the fact that three years isn't nearly enough of a head start, because i strive for certainty, i'll kill you, then nail you with minutia that leaves a sense of of confusion... i'll still never forget this public defender... an obvious moron, and how he jested i had a hobby with the law... the joke turns serious when i ask for the relevant acts, and let's just say a poor lady who's upbringing meant a yes to the police, even when the words are lost in translation, and even for a bottom of the class u of s lawyer... which made me chuckle at his snideness a bit, because i knew his deal was getting min prosecution for illegal activities that went on in a home she owned less than 5 percent off... pursuant to open avenues to a civil suit and claims her 7 figure home were proceeds of crime, which was agriegous, as they seemed more concerned with her than the relative who was carrying out the crimes in the original residence... i imagine a bonus was in store... yeah, nepostic wheeling can make you a good living in law, but seriously, like i said, once those acts were in the bag, you're done... like, you're talking to someone who finds lies in documents by noting small coincidental dates people overlook, and 400 pages in, that can add up... so yeah... i guess bud is suitable council for someone who doesn't speak english, but if i ever do law after medicine or something, i'll finally get to stop preaching about the artificial sense of standardization in a profession, since well, skills pay, because private industry doesn't have the same billing code for dr. house and mail it in, avoid unconventionalities to keep it safe, and hide from having to make that call, or generate that solution... in the u.s. those guys work in a wal mart and are paid accordingly... here, it's the same billing code as your hospitals best interest... yeah, if i come off as an elitist, i'm not, but just passing to me is laughable, i remember talking with the dean and being the only one that though p/f was bs... we don't need undergrad spectrums, but maybe a 5 point scale or something... cause if i had my autonomy strangleholded, on top of working within a structuralist paradigm which serves professions before patients (the more nebulous the discipline, the less the frcps conveys anything, yet we limit ourselves to, at times, simplistic and standardized approaches, which work when say you see person x, and he throw's anti-convulsant dejour at you... then you could see me, and not only will you manage, you'll know when you're side affect allleviating combination delayed delivery system will come out, and you'll know piquing my interest not only concluded my disorder, but explained the exclusion patients, and patients with similar symptoms as those seen in psych, but disciplines don't really communicate in this age of subspecialize to be valuable (which is honestly such bs, people who have extreme depth in a breadth of topics are the rarest, most valuable... think, not only can you claim strained relationship on your lawsuit for mobbing in the workplace (yeah, i know soc quite a bit too) and have a collection of 15 articles on peer assesment in medicine... the experts down in waterloo... remember how i mentioned... lawyers:librarians... and not even creative.. but back to the point, my strong background n neuro means i can explain a ton of psychosomatic things too, and well, if you understand fundamentals, you know where to look, then again... pass fails the old mechanic system, right... that's not my thing, and while people say you get the horses, i get them anyways, plus a ton of zebra's... so yeah, maybe we should base carms on like talent, or effort, iuno... whatev, there's always the united states of kick ass, be cool, instead of showing interest and flying under the radar... and i guess that's more my thing, then again, my specific area's of concern is currently a sketch, and someone needs to fill in the detail, so yeah, i guess being good not to kill someone doesn't cut it, but honestly, once you build enough of a base, learnings fun, because it's practical... and not only won't i kill anyone, i might be able to change a few people's view, and by a few, i mean, ****, a lot, cause when you go down the whole mental health money pit, which takes away from so many other resources, enthusiasm, soon enough wont be enough, because value is measured in as much as you take off public books as how much you add... and well, no other medical field, can chop so much cost off so infrastructurally steeply, it just has to convince the best and brightest that it's a respectable endeavor, cause while psych is bull**** to most people, the top psych's in the hospital are lifesavers, and people are apprechiative, because it's a skill that's hard to pick up via the old didadactic.. plus, people really need to lay off the i'm the professinal, you're the patient thing, oh yeah, maybe that's why i can get that whole rapport and disclosure thing, one part acting, another empathy, the third non-judgment... and not the painfully obvious forced hippy kind, the i've seen way worse than this so it's seriously not a big deal kind... yeah, that's hard to do when you take yourself seriously, because those professional markers don't get in the way of accupril, metroprolol, and atorvostatan most seniors walk out of their gp with... prob helps build trust actually, unfortunately, to jump from bs psychiatry to good psychiatrist, you sort of have to stop selling the paternalistic stuff to the gullible, even though it may help you get over the fact that your not a real doctor, it won't matter in a few months when homeless borderline patient er want's nothing to do with, let along his shings... and you can calm him down easy... hero to zero, cause all that matters is you served the purpose your protocol often guides you too... except 9 line checklists sort of mean that ionevitably you get the department member specializing in 10 minute drug consults, and the one who handles with ease the prior... which the white coat speed demon doesn't see because he specializes in psychosis and mania... just like everyone else who can go on the who website and download the clinical prescribing algorithim... yeah... specialists, i guess contrarily i know docs that don't see psychosis because they know their talents must be used efficiently, with those people who are incurable, until you do it, and that contingency grows, but like i said a while back... when you attach temporality, artificial frameworks in which to measure success, you fail, but when things are open, and you're 12 for 12 with an untreatable population, albeit with a 14 month average investment... that famous canadian psychologist alberta bandura just made your realize, this is kind of special, because anyone can repair a fracture... personally i'd take the thanks with ease, but few have the patience, flexibility, depth, knowledge, stemming from an intrinsic emotional basis as well as from devoted study, to say they got johny to love life, after he spent the better part of the last decade trying to kill himself... yeah, that's a bit different... something you have to feel to get... not that i'm dissing solid surgeons, or the behaviourally derived prescriptions, on hunches, who hears abilify doesn't cause wait (might have something to do with d1, and d2... throw in 5htc3... but who cares... when 1 percent of the pop needs that time which more thoughtful colleagues require to deal with the undealables, then we end up maximizing output, right... sorta like sending mcsorley out there to lay 20 hits so gretz can play 20 minutes and get the hat trick... most of the hits are the same, but without them, gretzy wouldn't have the time of day to attend to goal scoring... which, going back to econ101 is a pretty sick sunk cost...

 

yeah, hmmm, that's supposed to be a challenge to all the aspiring people who think getting is the bees knees, until it's obvious no one cares if you get an a in clinical skills, it's more 6 months later, you asking a colleague gue where you asking a colleague where mr so and so went, and laughing that he prob took off to florida, because like photo radar... or 4 behavioural psych classes teaches, lackof temporal contingency means minimal aversion, not even for guilts sake, but to proclude repeats

 

yeah, wow, go, go... i'm getting a little more ostentatious, minus the ostentatiousnesses because me seeminging ostentatious doesn't mean i am, since everyone tells me i'm smart, really skilled and humorously, i think i'm pretty average, in my eyes, just passionate, so yeah, forget the proving that... yeah, maybe i just like to think out loud during post's or something, beat's reading for sure i... i'f i read this and didn't know how much of a rl goof i was i'd probably think it sounded cocky too... but seriously, it's soooooo much fun when you don't have to prove stuff anymore, or try... you just have to make sure you get those ends... and even that's all the more easier... i don't need to be a big shot dermatologist to feel good about myself, i already do, because public speaking, always being on the edge, yet comfortable, because it's what you know, and you're steady, despite other's inferences your risky... nah, not at all, they only seem risky because poor assesment of others phenomenelogical experience and of the limit of social norm... and well, that's natural, most people aren't deep and open with others, and extrapolate from behaviour... sort of like a gallup pole of 3, contra the your the first person i've told you hear a few hundred times over a couple thousand hours, mostly with strangers... basically, things seem risky when you ignore the obvious, because don't have the statistical power of others experience to know even the most prude among us are like sort of weird on the social-behavioral extrapolation scale... then again, i get what i want, no? because i wrecklessly challenged a telecome companies barage of salaried, unmotivated lawyers, who were used to dealing with, at most, persistent whiners... see, the stat power thing... prob similar reason i don't give the time of day to titles, it's hard to when the annoying ones try and shut you down and you're sort of being add zoning into another convo making them look retarded at the same time, cause multi-tasking's more your thing... yeah, once the walls fall down, you learn to push yourself... but playing smart... i don't mean smart, i mean well forget tactics against brute force, because i might just ask you why the ring even needs ropes (back to the joe frazer mo ali ref, lol, i don't feel you can be giving it all, giving it your all, i feel you have to utilize every tool around you the maximize your ends... just think 90's yankees, when winning's the goal, why not double the budget even after you have the best team in baseball, because going from 1 to 1 is superficially similar, but the measure is in how much trouble you get to the championship

 

wanna call me an idiot, say my views are retarded, that'd rock my world, i love differen't perspectives perceive that because sometimes i talk naturally in a way that's... look for a sea world euphism here, lol... self-assured and confident... and i know a ton of people that would go right back on me in person

 

haha, i always just start writing this and float into hyperfocus mode, i know for a fact this like collection has no unifying thesis, but **** it, have fun reading... and take home this message... lol, the one on top is the one who keeps getting back up, because what others miss is every attempt means new skills gained, more perspective, greater resiliency, certainty your hard effort will pay off (something i rely on, and cavemanlike as it sounds... the only way i know to do it is by outworking competing interests to an extent where i don't have to worry about random variables, the butterfly effect becomes a sort of non factor, like a bed of needles of sorts, because every point of failure is interconnected with 25 other supports... i always think of a brute force algorithim in chess, even though my comp sci friends say im an idiot, but in the end, that's what it is...so yeah... do that, then success is assured, and motivation steams easily... also, make sure your working towards something like not being a loan manager, because statistically, if you're reading this, you'd find it boring... minus the challenge of napping between customers, lol